


From There to Here

by SloanGreyMercyDeath



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Chicago pizza, Established Relationship, F/F, No Angst, Route 66 - Freeform, a whole lot of sex on the side of the road, and fall in love, drink moonshine, it's a roadtrip baby!, only love, so soft, stay at shitty motels, the softest, they see cows, this is so fucking soft baby, two ladies being babies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:08:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27021016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SloanGreyMercyDeath/pseuds/SloanGreyMercyDeath
Summary: JJ and Emily have two weeks of PTO that Hotch forces them to use. So, they decide to take a cross-country roadtrip together.
Relationships: Jennifer "JJ" Jareau/Emily Prentiss
Comments: 62
Kudos: 260





	1. Heading Out

**Author's Note:**

> this is just some soft, soft love baby. No angst here at all. Just kissing and loving and driving.

Slowly, JJ claws her way to wakefulness. The world comes back to her in small sensory pieces. Her feet are cold where the quilt has been pulled away and she can feel the soft cotton sheets pressing into her bare skin. The sheets whisper as she tucks her legs back under the quilt in a vain attempt to warm herself before she has to get out of bed. 

The alarm blares a second later, startling her. She sneaks a hand out of the covers and fumbles along the bed to the side table, eventually finding the blaring device. It takes a couple smacks to silence the alarm, but soon the room is quiet again. Her hand falls heavily off the side table, back onto the bed, and back under the covers.

She knows that she needs to wake up because they have things to do, but she _also_ knows that it’s three in the morning and that’s far too early to be awake. Rolling onto her side, JJ presses herself into the warm body beside her. The smell of dry shampoo and expensive Parisian face cream fills her senses, lulling her back toward sleep. The scent is so familiar and comforting that she’s powerless against its thrall. Emily’s body heat relaxes JJ and her eyes start to drift shut again.

“Babe…” Emily mumbles into her pillow. “Vacation.”

Whining into Emily’s ear, JJ throws her arm over her naked waist and curls her hand around a perfect breast. Emily pushes her body back into JJ’s, humming happily at the gentle touches. They need to hit the road, but Emily's skin is so soft beneath her hands.

Slowly sucking in a deep breath through her nose, Emily rolls over in JJ’s arms. Her eyes are still closed, but her mouth is curled into a content smile. She scoots down, hands running over JJ’s flat stomach, and tucks her head under JJ’s chin.

“We need to get up,” Emily sighs into JJ’s neck. “Gotta get going.”

“I know,” JJ answers. She buries her face in Emily’s hair, breathing deeply.

Emily grunts and jerks her head back to glare half-heartedly at her girlfriend. “Don’t smell my hair, weirdo.”

With a grin, JJ traces meaningless patterns on Emily’s back. “But you smell so good.”

JJ watches as Emily debates how important leaving on time _really_ is. Her pupils widen with desire as the thigh she has tucked between JJ’s legs creeps up. JJ waits until Emily finally gives in to her lust, mouth opening and eyes dropping to JJ’s lips.

“Come on,” JJ says with a grin, moving out of Emily’s grasp. “We need to get going, right?”

“That’s just mean.” Emily sits up, frowning at JJ as she gets off the bed. “You did that on purpose.”

JJ smiles cheekily, winking at Emily. “Had to wake you up somehow, Prentiss.”

She dodges a thrown pillow and walks to her dresser. It’s the first day of their cross country roadtrip, so she wants to make sure she’s comfortable. They’ve already packed everything and put it in the car, so it’s just a matter of getting dressed, eating a quick breakfast, and hitting the road. She reaches up to turn the lamp on when two arms wrap around her stomach.

Hot hands slide up to cup her breasts, and Emily presses flush against her. She feels Emily’s breasts against her back as wooden knobs dig into JJ’s skin when she’s pushed forcefully into the dresser. Steadying herself against the hardwood, she laughs breathlessly in anticipation. Emily’s lips barely brush over JJ’s ear, her tongue flicking out just enough to tease.

“You’re not getting away with that so easily,” Emily threatens, her voice low and dark as molasses. It sends heat straight between JJ’s legs and she knows she won’t say no to this. “Spread your legs, Jareau.”

JJ obeys eagerly, moving her legs apart to make room. “We have to leave soon.”

“Then come quickly.”

Emily’s hands squeeze JJ’s breasts, fingers pinching always sensitive nipples. They’d spent the night before making love, but her body always responds to Emily’s touch, no matter how tired she is. Even after years of sex, the delicate skin of JJ’s small, perfect breasts feels like heaven against Emily’s palms. Her nipples tighten as Emily teases them with dull nails.

Emily drags her lips down JJ’s neck to her shoulder, leaving wet kisses that make JJ’s body melt. She moans as Emily sucks on her pulse point painfully before soothing the sore spot with her tongue. It doesn’t matter where she uses it - Emily’s mouth on her body makes JJ moan with pleasure. She sucks in a shaky breath and tries to calm her racing heart.

Moving her hands away from JJ’s breasts, Emily smiles into the crook of her neck as the woman in front of her whimpers at the loss. One hand drifts lower, tracing the lean muscle of JJ’s stomach, teasing her as they make their way downward. Emily’s other hand moves upward, lightly wrapping around JJ’s neck. It doesn’t apply pressure, but JJ shivers under the threat. 

Emily gently slides her nose along the smooth skin of JJ’s shoulder. Her teeth sink in and JJ gasps, distantly thinking that she won’t be wearing a tanktop any time soon. The thought doesn’t upset her.

JJ’s body is quivering beneath Emily’s deliberately slow touch. She knows exactly how to tease and torture her lover. The way JJ’s hips push back into her is thrilling, so she finally decides to give JJ a little bit more and dips one hand between her legs.

With a sigh, JJ’s head drops back onto her shoulder, eyes fluttering shut. Emily is addicted to the way JJ feels, the way her body responds so easily to Emily’s touches, the way JJ’s hand reaches behind her to tangle into Emily’s hair and hold her in place. She tightens her grip on JJ’s long neck almost imperceptibly. 

As Emily draws slow, teasing circles through JJ’s wetness, she focuses on the pulse beneath her other hand, feeling how it races under her touch. Sometimes, she needs a reminder that they’re both alive and together and safe. The whimpers that escape JJ’s lips help remind her of that, so does the way JJ’s hips buck against her fingers, trying to get more friction.

“I thought,” JJ gasps, “that I needed to finish quickly.”

Emily hums against JJ’s ear in confirmation, moving her hand further between JJ’s legs and thrusting two fingers inside of her. “So get going.”

Laughing, JJ shifts her feet again, widening her legs further so Emily can move deeper. The pace picks up and JJ’s laugh catches in her throat, becoming a strangled moan. She shoves her free hand behind her back, between their bodies, and finds Emily as wet as she is.

Emily moves back just enough to give JJ room to touch her right where she needs it. She knows that she isn’t going to last long. An incredibly intimate dream had left her ready from the moment she’d woken up. Touching JJ like this only turns her on more and makes it hard to focus on anything but the hand between her legs.

Her rhythm falters as she whimpers into JJ’s ear, receiving a sharp gasp in return. Suddenly, JJ shoves her backward, making her stumble away. Her hand falls from JJ’s neck and she’s opening her mouth to complain when JJ crashes into her again. They kiss frantically and messily, too caught up in how close they both are to care about anything else.

The back of Emily’s knees hit the bed and she drops heavily. JJ is in her lap instantly. She grabs Emily’s hand and shoves it between her legs, easily sliding Emily’s fingers back inside of her. Once Emliy’s brain catches up to her body, she starts a punishing rhythm. JJ cries out, eyes slamming shut as she rides Emily’s fingers, but she reaches between them to touch Emily, too.

She makes sure not to reach too low and touch Emily’s entrance. Very early on in the relationship, Emily made it clear that she did not enjoy penetration. She’s down for just about anything else, but that is her limit. It’s no great loss. Over the years, JJ perfected different ways to touch Emily that turn her into putty. Emily is so close now anyway that she doesn’t need anything special, which is good because JJ doesn’t have the ability to make any coherent decisions right now.

Emily whines into her mouth, free hand clutching JJ’s waist. She’s so close, but she wants to see JJ come apart in front of her. JJ breaks their kiss and presses their foreheads together, so they can look into each other’s eyes. She cups a hand around the back of Emily’s head as leverage so she can pick up the pace of her hips.

“I love you,” JJ whispers, voice trembling as much as her body. The hand buried between Emily’s legs slips easily against her in incoherent patterns. Emily stutters JJ’s name between gasps. “Come for me, baby.”

Emily comes with a gasp, fighting to keep her eyes open. With a couple more thrusts, JJ’s orgasm slams into her and her grip on Emily’s head tightens painfully, making her eyes water. JJ kisses Emily as best she can, but it’s just a mess of tongues and teeth. They hold each other close until their bodies begin to calm.

With a sigh, Emily tears her mouth away and falls backward onto the bed, taking JJ with her. “I need a nap,” she mumbles as her eyes flutter shut.

“We have to go,” JJ reminds her. She covers Emily’s face in featherlight kisses until Emily pushes her off. “This was your idea, you know.”

“Well, it was a good idea, wasn’t it?” 

JJ can’t disagree with that, so she just rolls off the bed onto her feet and holds her hands out to Emily. “Shower time. If you keep your hands to yourself, I’ll buy you donuts.”

Squinting at her, Emily considers the offer. She doesn’t necessarily appreciate being bargained with like a child, but post-sex donuts is a great idea. With an overly put-upon sigh, Emily rolls her eyes and sits up again. 

“Two dozen, glazed with chocolate frosting, and an iced coffee.”

“It’s a deal.”

It takes them another half an hour to get on the road. Emily does not keep her hands to herself in the shower, but JJ manages to fend off her advances. It’s hard because the rose-scented soap Emily insists on buying is intoxicating and Emily’s insistent on scrubbing every inch of JJ’s body. Thankfully, she lets JJ wash her own hair and then JJ slips out of the shower, leaving a grumbling Emily behind.

They dress quickly, JJ in a loose t-shirt, cut off jeans, and flip-flops and Emily in a tight, red tank top and black sweatpants. She refuses to put shoes on because she’s just going to take them off in the car. No amount of playful arguing from JJ convinces her, so JJ just tucks Emily’s sandals into her backpack.

They’ve been dating for years, so JJ knows which battles are worth picking. Wearing sandals to the car is not one of those battles. Emily opens the fridge and pulls out the two small coolers that they packed the night before, glaring at the harsh light. The house around them is still dark, only a few, small lights plugged into outlets providing any light. She slams the fridge shut as punishment for the brightness.

As she takes the coolers out to the car, JJ places a mobile order at Dunkin Donuts, so it’s ready for them when they get there. She hears the car door shut and tucks her phone away in her pocket. Any second Emily is going to start whining about how it’s cold outside and JJ hasn’t turned the heater on yet. Smiling affectionately, JJ heads for the front door, picking up her backpack as she passes the couch.

After settling the alarm, JJ walks outside, quickly locking the door and bouncing down the porch steps. It’s still the middle of the night, so the street is dark around her. Instinctively, she looks around as she heads to the car. Emily probably did her own sweep, but it doesn’t hurt to have an extra set of eyes. There’s no one after them right now, but both of them know just how many bad guys are out there.

She pulls open the back door and sees that Emily has sprawled out in the backseat, falling back asleep immediately. JJ isn’t surprised. She agreed to drive first yesterday for this exact reason. Emily sleeps like the dead. Wincing as unpleasant memories fill her mind, she closes the door silently and moves to the front door.

JJ climbs into the car, slinging the backpack onto the passenger seat. She reaches down to take her flip-flops off and toss them next to her backpack. After buckling herself in, JJ starts the car, turning the heat up and her lights on.

There’s no traffic this early and JJ drives calmly through the silent streets. With their combined salaries (and some of Emily’s inheritance), they bought a house in Alexandria a year or so ago. It was so annoying to drive into DC just to spend one night at Emily’s place, but JJ’s apartment in Woodbridge was too small for both of them. From Alexandria, they can still metro into DC and it’s a much shorter drive home from Quantico.

A small part of JJ’s brain, one that sounds exactly like her mother, tells her that buying a house with someone she isn’t married to is risky. A larger part of her brain reminds her that she and Emily are forever, that marriage is risky, too, and she shouldn’t wait to move forward with her life just because they haven't signed a piece of paper. Behind her, Emily snores softly and JJ’s heart fills with warmth.

She stops at a red light and looks over her shoulder at Emily. Her girlfriend is lying on her back, one arm flung over her eyes to block the streetlights and the other hanging limply to the floor. She looks so open and vulnerable that JJ can’t help but reach back to stroke a finger over the thin strip of skin visible between her tanktop and her sweatpants.

A car behind her honks and she jumps, facing forward again. The light is green, so she lightly presses on the gas and rolls forward. She turns her left blinker on and turns into a strip mall. The parking lot is almost empty, the orange street lights making the asphalt glow. JJ swallows a yawn and parks in front of the Dunkin Donuts.

It takes two minutes to put her flip-flops on, run inside, pick up the two (and a half) dozen donuts, and the two large iced coffees. When she gets back to the car, Emily is sitting in the passenger seat, JJ’s backpack on the floor between her feet. Of course her body has an internal donuts-and-coffee timer.

Emily jumps out of the car and hurries around to take the loot from JJ. Bouncing painfully from foot to foot, she waits impatiently for JJ to open her door and sit down. JJ pulls the door open as slowly as possible, jutting out her lower lip in false sympathy.

“Your feet must really hurt,” JJ sighs, batting her eyelashes and ducking into the car. She takes her flip-flops off with painstaking care and tosses them onto the floor of the passenger seat. “Bet you wish you were wearing shoes.”

“I’m fine,” Emily lies through clenched teeth. “Just take these!”

Laughing, JJ takes the donuts and coffee from her and watches as she races back around the car. She puts their coffee in the cup holders as Emily practically jumps into the car, closing the door with a thud. She buckles herself in with lightning speed. Clapping her hands together, Emily snatches one large box of donuts from JJ.

“Don’t tell Morgan about this,” Emily mumbles around a mouthful of bread and sugar.

JJ rolls her eyes fondly and reaches into the backseat to put the other two boxes down. “Afraid he’ll make you do extra fitness training?”

Snorting, Emily just shakes her head. “I don’t want him to be too jealous. He’s already upset we took two full weeks off.”

“That’s Hotch’s fault, not ours.”

“I know, but he’s a big baby.”

JJ barks a laugh and takes a deep drink of her coffee. The chill spreads through her chest, helping to wake her up. Unlike Emily, she can’t just crawl back into the backseat and take an hour long sugar-and-carb induced nap. Glancing at Emily, JJ has to bite her lip to keep herself from cackling. Four of Emily’s donuts are already gone and her lips are sticky from the chocolate and glaze.

Emily swallows the last bite of her fourth donut and smiles at JJ. “What?”

Instead of answering, JJ cups the back of Emily’s neck and tugs her close, kissing her deeply. Emily moans into her mouth, hands jumping forward to grab JJ’s face. They make out in front of the Dunkin Donuts until the taste of sugar fades from Emily’s lips.

Lightly pushing her away, JJ grins smugly. “God, you’re easy.”

“Huh?” Emily blinks slowly, eyes unfocused from all the kissing. “What?”

“Eat your donuts,” JJ laughs. She starts the car and turns the headlights on. “We gotta hit the road.”

“Roadtrip!” Emily cheers loudly, startling JJ. She puts her feet up on the dashboard and picks up a fifth donut. “You and me on the open road!”

JJ can’t keep the grin off her face as she types in the address of their first stop into her phone. She plugs it into the charging cord and then sticks it into the holder they bought just for this trip. It says they’ll get there by 7, but she’s willing to bet it’s going to be later than that. 

She reverses out of the parking spot and turns them back onto the empty street. Emily just keeps working her way through the donuts and toward that nap. It doesn’t bother JJ that she’ll be driving alone for a few hours. It’s actually nice to get some quiet time. Usually, she was driving unsubs, victims, or teammates. The whole point of this vacation was to relax.

She and Emily found out a few days ago that they each have two weeks of PTO that won't roll over into the new year. It’s such a stupid policy, but a policy that exists nonetheless. It’s a policy that JJ and Emily were aware of, but never thought about before. Usually, they would use every precious minute of time off. However, it was a rough year.

One difficult case after another kept them busy and, somehow, they were entering November with two full weeks off. When they found out, they spent an hour locked in Hotch’s office trying to give the days away, but he refused. Instead, _he_ had managed to convince _them_ to actually use the time. He muttered something about ‘uninterrupted private time’ and both women suddenly found themselves looking forward to the time off.

Right now, at almost half-past four in the morning, they are regretting the choice to drive across America. JJ merges onto 395 North toward Washington, finally seeing other drivers. Beside her, Emily groans and rubs her stomach.

She ate nine donuts before finally tapping out. Closing the box, she puts it on the dash and unbuckles her seatbelt. Trying not to take her eyes off the highway, JJ leans toward the door to give Emily more room as she climbs between the seats into the back. She lands on the soft, leather cushions with a thump and grins at JJ through the rearview mirror.

“Wake me up when we get to Philly.”

“You didn’t drink your coffee,” JJ says, scoffing. “You were so insistent earlier.”

Emily just ducks forward to kiss JJ’s cheek before laying down. “I’ll drink it later. It’s already cold, anyway.”

Somehow, JJ knew she was going to say that. “We could have gone to another Dunkin Donuts.”

There’s no response and she quickly glances into the backseat to see her girlfriend asleep. Honestly, she’s impressed at how fast Emily can fall asleep. It has taken them a lot of work to get to this point. For the first few years they were together, Emily had terrible nightmares. She barely ever slept. It warms JJ’s heart to see her sleeping peacefully now. Besides, she needs her rest. They have a very busy two weeks ahead of them.


	2. Skulls, Stories, and Strawberry Milkshakes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Mutter Museum is very cool! I finally went last year (for my bachelor party lmao) and it was very spooky and very cool! I highly suggest going once it's safe again!

Emily wakes up after a while to find JJ humming softly to herself. It’s still dark out, but the first hints of light are peeking over the hills and mountains in the distance. She sits up slowly, rubbing her eyes and pushing her hands through her hair. 

“What time is it?” she mumbles, crossing her legs on the seat. “Where are we?”

JJ shoots a smile over her shoulder and pulls Emily’s coffee out of the cupholder. Passing it back, she answers Emily’s questions. “It’s almost eight. We’ll be in Philly in half an hour.”

“Jeez,” she mumbles, taking the coffee and chewing on the straw. “Sorry for sleeping so long.”

“It’s fine,” JJ says, smiling at the highway. “I called my mom to let her know we were coming.”

Emily nods as she slowly drinks her coffee. She slides to a window and looks around at the countryside. Between the distant mountains, the rolling fields, and the trees that line the road, there is so much green around them. She’s seen a lot of America, but mostly cities and the occasional lakeside cabin. All the in-between is new to her.

Her sleepy brain finally catches up to what JJ said. She forgot that they were going to see Sandy. Emily and Sandy get along well. Although, Sandy always tells her she needs to get some sun. When she comes to DC for the holidays, Sandy always tries to get Emily to help her cook, but it never goes well. Aside from thinking Emily has a Vitamin D deficiency and wishing she had better homemaking skills, Sandy loves her.

“What’d she say?” Emily asks, tearing her eyes off the scenery to look at JJ in the driver’s seat. “She’s not going to make me cook, right?”

“No,” JJ laughs, grinning at her through the rearview mirror. “I think that ship has sailed.”

“Thank god.”

She drinks her coffee as they drive into Philadelphia, looking around at the city. It looks different like this. They use the BAU plane when they come for cases and Emily thinks she’s never actually driven into the city before. 

JJ navigates the narrow streets with ease. She came to Philly a lot in college when she wanted to go to gay clubs and didn’t want to run into anyone she knew. She loves the city a lot, but most of her memories there are hazy. Both because of how long it's been and because of how drunk she used to get. She remembers Philly in the morning, though. That's when she usually left to drive back to Pittsburgh.

As she pulls into the public parking lot across from the Mutter Museum, Emily climbs between the seats again and plops down beside her. The museum doesn’t open for another hour and a half, so they have some time to kill. JJ parks and unbuckles her seatbelt, turning to smile at Emily.

“Give me donuts,” JJ demands, jerking her thumb at the backseat.

With a heavy sigh, Emily twists around to picks up the second box of donuts and hands it to JJ. She wants more, but she isn’t sure if she should eat them. Not that she’d ever admit it, but she might be getting too old to eat donuts at 3AM. Growing old is a cruel tragedy.

“So,” JJ says, delicately tearing a piece off a donut, “what’s the plan for today?”

Emily unzips the backpack at her feet and pulls out a black binder. They threw together some haphazard plans over wine last night and she is excited to see what they came up with. They'd only had one night to plan and most of it had been spent buy supplies and packing. Putting her feet up on the dashboard, she opens the binder on her lap.

“There is...a single piece of paper in here,” Emily sighs, looking at JJ with raised eyebrows. “Didn’t we spend two hours planning?”

JJ snorts and swallows. “No. We spent 10 minutes planning and two hours drinking.”

“Ah. That sounds more like us.”

They grin at each other and Emily reaches over to take a donut. It doesn’t matter if she gets sick later. She wants a donut now and there’s no reason to deny herself these Earthly treats.

Taking a bite, she reads the list off the paper. “It says… Mommy Jareau, Wolf Sanctuary, and-”

“No way,” JJ interrupts her, eyes widening. “We are _not_ going to the Wolf Sanctuary!”

“Is it the wolves?” Emily asks her. She sips her coffee. “Scared of the wolves?”

“No,” JJ denies. She quickly finishes her donut and picks up another. “I’m not scared of dogs or wolves anymore. I just know that I don’t want to spend two hours in the woods in November watching you try to pet wolves.”

Emily raises an insulted eyebrow. “Trying? Do or do not, babe. I would pet those wolves.”

JJ doesn’t dignify that with an answer. Instead, she starts on her donut and nods to the paper. “Go on. What’s the last thing say?”

“Uh, it says Hershey for lunch.”

“Yeah,” JJ laughs, “that’s another no. We’re not going to Hershey park. It’s so overrated.”

“Well, of course _you_ think that!” Emily swings a leg around to playful kick at JJ. JJ laughs, pushing her away, and she just drops her foot onto JJ’s seat, sticking her toes under warm thighs. “You grew up so close to Hershey park. I’ve never even been. It would be a treat!”

Closing the donuts, JJ tosses the box onto the dash. “It would be a treat if we were twelve. Besides, I know you. You’d eat your weight in chocolate and then I’d have to deal with you whining and moaning for the rest of the day.”

“Well, that’s just not true,” Emily defends, knowing full well it was definitely true. “I’ll- I’ll- I’ll get a hotdog! I will eat a hotdog.”

“You’re going to make me drive you to Hershey park, as in _Hershey chocolate_ ” JJ clarifies, “and then eat...a hot dog?”

Sighing, Emily nods in defeat. She looks at JJ with sad eyes. “Are we not eating lunch, then?”

JJ grins and throws herself onto Emily, making her grab her awkwardly to keep them both from falling to the floor of the passenger seat. The donut box is not so lucky, sliding off JJ's lap and crashing to the floor. Emily whimpers at the thought of all the chocolate frosting smearing across the top of the box. Then, JJ kisses her neck and she's distracted.

“You’re very food motivated, aren’t you?” JJ asks her, wrapping her arms around Emily's waist. 

“I’d say I’m wine motivated,” Emily jokes, wiggling so her head is leaning against the door. She’s laying horizontal across the front seats, the console making her arch back painfully, but JJ is splayed out on top of her and she doesn’t even notice she’s uncomfortable. “But food is a close second, yes.”

JJ hums thoughtfully into Emily’s neck before pressing a quick kiss to the skin there. “I know a diner that makes amazing strawberry milkshakes.”

“That sounds perfect.”

They lay like that until Emily’s back starts to hurt too much. If she grumbles about being almost 50, JJ pretends not to hear. They spend the rest of the time waiting for the museum to open finishing off the donuts and talking about nothing. It’s a Monday morning, so the city slowly fills with life and they play a familiar game of trying to profile total strangers. It ends (like it always does) with them just declaring everyone a serial killer.

At exactly 10 on the dot, Emily takes her flip-flops from JJ’s backpack and puts them on. If she didn’t look so excited, JJ might have teased her for it. But Emily is grinning and scrambling to grab her phone and wallet and jump out of the car, so JJ just opens her door and steps out into the cool November air.

Neither of them are dressed for a museum, but they don’t care. They can't be the first pair of tourists to be underdressed. They hold hands as they wait for an opportunity to cross the street and then Emily pulls JJ up the steps and inside. Immediately, JJ understands why Emily wanted to come here.

The lobby of the museum looks like a funeral parlor. A chandelier hangs above a white marble floor, illuminating stone pillars set against rough stone walls. Beyond that is a room with a deep red carpet, heavy red and gold curtains, and wood paneled walls. It’s scary and JJ realizes that she never asked what kind of museum this is.

She turns to ask Emily, but finds her across the lobby buying tickets. The cashier blushes at something Emily says and JJ smiles. Emily just kind of has that effect people and JJ loves it. She wanders over to join the conversation.

“...to come here for a long time,” Emily is saying. Her face lights up in a grin and the cashier looks a little bit dazed. “I’m really interested in seeing the Skull Collection.”

“Skulls,” JJ repeats, stopping beside her girlfriend. “We’re here to see skulls?”

Emily turns that grin on her like a spotlight, eyes shining with excitement. “Not just any skulls,” she says, taking the tickets from the cashier. “The skulls that disproved Phrenology.”

“Oh.” JJ shrugs and smiles at the cashier as Emily leads her toward the stairs into the exhibit. “Cool, I guess. Is this a skull museum?”

“It’s so much more than that.”

It doesn’t take JJ long to see what the ‘more’ is. It turns out that the Mutter Museum is a museum of medical history. The incredible gothic décor holds samples of human organs, diseased limbs, and, yes, a display of skulls. 189 skulls, Emily tells her several times.

Usually, the goth side of Emily manifests in black clothing, dark eyeliner, classic horror movies, and metal music. JJ doesn’t see a lot of this side of her. In fact, their job means they see this kind of body horror daily and try to avoid it in their free time. She never expected that Emily would take her to a museum specifically to look at it.

When Emily opens the 10th drawer that holds ‘foreign objects’ found in human airways and gasps over a button, JJ sighs and moves on without her. She has to admit that despite how gross it is, it’s also kind of cool. She reads the labels on a few specimens that catch her eye and tries to be interested for Emily’s sake. God knows, she’s dragged Emily to plenty of Redskins games before. If this is Emily’s Sunday night football, then JJ can humor her.

She winces at incredibly wrinkled foot in a jar and moves on to another display case. Emily looks up to see JJ peering through the glass and smiles. JJ is a little squeamish, even though she always denies the fact, but she’s nothing if not a good sport. Emily won’t make her stay too long, but it’s nice that she hasn’t complained at all.

Emily saunters over to her girlfriend. “Hey,” she says quietly. "How are you doing?"

Jumping, JJ gives her a guilty smile. “Hey. Fine. I’m just looking at this, uh…” She squints to read a label. “Brain swollen by syphilis. It’s...pretty neat.”

“When I was in college,” Emily starts, taking JJ’s hand, “I asked a girlfriend to take me here. She had already gone with some friends, so she knew what was here. She told me that I was a freak for actually _wanting_ to see this stuff and that she thought I only pretended to like those ‘scary French movies’ because I wanted to seem cool. When she realized I actually liked these sort of things...Well, anyway. I just wanted to say thanks for not thinking I'm a freak.” She presses a kiss to JJ’s cheek. “You don’t have to read this stuff. We can go.”

“Emily,” JJ breathes, moving closer, “I definitely think you’re a freak, but you’re my freak and I love you.”

They kiss softly and they both know it’s weird to have a romantic moment surrounded by body parts, but after so long in the BAU, it doesn’t really phase them. Emily breaks the kiss, nipping at JJ’s bottom lip before stepping away. She takes a look around the room.

“It’s kind of gross, right?” she says, wrinkling her nose. She grins at JJ, making her heart pound in her chest. “Let’s get out of here.”

JJ slumps with relief and pulls Emily out of the showroom and back into the lobby. They smile at the cashier as they stroll past her, opening the door and blinking into the bright sunlight. JJ takes a breath of fresh air and looks at Emily.

“You’re turn to drive.”

Emily just nods and adjusts her grip on JJ’s hand. They walk back to their car and Emily leads JJ around to the passenger seat. Opening the door for her, Emily gently helps JJ sit, closing the door for her once she’s inside. Quickly getting into the driver’s seat, she takes her shoes off and throws them over her shoulder, grinning at JJ.

“Where we’re going, we don’t need shoes.”

“I think my mom will probably disagree,” JJ tells her, smiling, “but we’ll keep this our little secret.”  
0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000  
Another few hours pass quickly. With Emily driving, they make good progress across Pennsylvania, zooming past other cars and the endless green that surrounds them. JJ spends most of the time with her head out the window, letting the cool breeze whip her hair around. They turn the music up so Emily can hear it over the rushing air.

Even though JJ has her seatbelt on, she’s managed to twist herself completely. One bare foot is tucked under Emily’s butt and Emily’s hand is wrapped around a lean calf, easing her fear that JJ is going to fall out of the car. JJ’s other leg is on the dashboard, toes pressed against the glass to hold herself in place. Half her body is out the window, her hands holding onto the roof as she takes deep breaths of fresh country air.

Emily loves how quickly JJ’s guard fell once they were outside of city limits. It’s like the small town girl rises to the surface and takes over, leaving the cautious FBI agent on the side of the highway. Emily understands the feeling. Her hair is tied up in a messy bun high on her head, shoulders and feet bare to the world. She hasn’t felt this carefree since…. Maybe ever.

They fly past a large sign listing the food options at the next exit and JJ pulls herself back into the car, butt dropping onto the passenger seat with a soft thump. “Take the next exit,” she says, pushing her hair out of her face. “It’s the diner I told you about. It’s great.”

Emily just nods and puts her turn signal on. She has to remind herself to keep her eyes on the road and not on the way JJ’s t-shirt has ridden up on her stomach, exposing firm abs, or the way her windblown hair made her look so young and magical. Following an old blue jeep, she gently guided JJ’s massive Escalade onto the exit, stopping at a red light.

“Left,” JJ tells her, pulling a hair tie out of the center console and tying her hair up. “It’ll be just past the Shell.”

“Wow, you’ve come here a lot, huh?”

JJ sighs wistfully and crosses her legs on the seat. “Yeah, we’d stop on the way to my grandparents’ farm.”

Turning left into the Summit Diner parking lot, Emily smiles, imagining a young JJ kicking her feet against a diner booth while she drinks Strawberry Milkshakes. “That’s so rustic.”

“Ok, we didn’t all grow up going to Parisian cafes.”

Emily just pats JJ’s thigh and pulls into a parking spot. Their very different upbrings are a frequent topic of conversation. When they first started talking about their pasts, it was hard to relate. They can both understand the big picture things, like loneliness and loss, but all the small details can be hard to grasp. 

JJ is very familiar with roadside diners and long car drives, but Emily grew up going to Michelin restaurants and flying in private jets. Maybe that’s why the idea of a roadtrip excites them both. For JJ, it’s nostalgic and familiar. For Emily, it’s a brand new experience unlike any other.

Turning the car off, Emily looks at JJ and smiles. “I mean ‘rustic’ in a good way. It’s sweet.”

“I know,” JJ replies softly, returning Emily’s smile. “I’m just teasing. I think I’m hangry.”

“Ok,” Emily chuckles, unbuckling her seatbelt and opening her door. “Let’s put some dairy in you before you murder me.”

They got out of the car and headed into the diner, keeping some space between them. Last night, they decided to play it cool while they were on the road. Neither of them are the least bit ashamed of being gay, but rural America isn’t exactly known for being accepting.

“I’ll be right with you two,” the waitress behind the counter calls to them. She looks like a nice older woman, the exact type of person you’d expect to be a waitress at a diner like this. “Take a seat anywhere.”

“What do you think?” Emily asks JJ. “You’re the expert.”

JJ looks around the diner, trying to remember where she used to sit with her family. The diner hasn’t changed at all in the years since she’d last eaten here. She couldn’t even count how long it had been. When she started high school, she was too busy for frequent trips out to the farm, and after college, she did her best not to come home.

The diner is small, with the long breakfast bar taking up most of the space. Booths line the walls, the grey and black cushions are cracked with wear. A feeling more than a memory guides her to a booth in the left corner of the diner. It’s surrounded by windows, with a view of the street and the old laundromat next door.

She stops beside the booth and looks at Emily. “Which side do you want?”

“Ladies first,” Emily answers with a wink.

Rolling her eyes affectionately, JJ sits on the bench against the wall, prompting Emily to sit across from her. The menus are tucked between the wall and the sugar shaker, so Emily just takes them, giving one to JJ and opening one in front of her. The cheesy graphic design hurts her, but she ignores it to look over her options.

The waitress appears at the end of the table, smiling. “I know you just sat, but can I get you something to drink?”

“Two strawberry milkshakes,” JJ answers for the both of them.

Emily snorts. “And a black coffee, for me.”

“Of course, Honey.” The waitress gestures at their menus. “Take your time. I’ll be right back.”

She wanders away and Emily goes back to looking at the menu. The food all seems alien to her. There’s a burger with bacon, jelly, and peanut butter, a ‘Cod Sandwich’ that seems to just be a piece of breaded Cod between two slices of white bread, and grilled liver which she just does not love JJ enough to try.

“What are you thinking?” JJ asks her. “Anything stick out?”

“Well,” Emily says, clicking her tongue. “You know… A few things stick out.”

JJ laughs at her. She kicks Emily’s shin lightly under the table, grinning at the gentle glare she receives in return. “Don’t be a snob! Most of our meals are going to be at places like this.”

“What do you suggest?” Emily puts her menu down helplessly. “Just order for me. NOT the liver.”

The waitress walks over to their table again with their drinks balanced on a metal platter. She sets a strawberry milkshake in front of each of them and the cup of coffee in front of Emily. “What can I get you, ladies?”

“I’ll have a stack of waffles with butter pecan syrup,” JJ starts, grinning at the waitress, “and she’ll have the meatloaf sandwich, and _we’ll_ have the fried pickle appetizer.”

The waitress gives Emily an amused look and laughs when Emily just shrugs, clearly out of her depth. “Alright! I’ll have those pickles out in a jiff.”

When she walks away again, Emily turns back to JJ. “Fried pickles? Meatloaf sandwich? JJ, babe, I love you. You know that, but this...it’s not food.”

“It’s comfort food,” JJ corrects her. “It’s the best kind of food. You’ll like it.”

“I don’t know…”

She kicks Emily’s shin again, a little bit harder this time. “How many slimy French dishes have I eaten for you? You can’t eat something as basic as a fried pickle for me?”

With a sigh, Emily just shakes her head, already knowing that she’s giving in to JJ’s big, blue eyes. It’s comical how easy it is for JJ to convince her to do something. Still, it’s a good problem to have and Emily does like pickles.

“Okay, okay,” Emily finally groans, holding her hands up in defeat. “I bow before Miss Pennsylvania Petite.”

“As you should,” JJ teases. She crosses her arms on the table and looks around the dinner. “You know, when I was an undergrad, I would go to the diner by campus almost every night. I’d order coffee and eat chicken tenders and do my reading.”

Emily scoots to the inside of the booth and leans against the wall, stretching her legs out on the seat. “Oh, yeah?”

JJ’s head tilts as she remembers that period of her life. “I didn’t really have the money to eat out so much, but with a student discount, it wasn’t too expensive. I didn’t go for cheap chicken tenders or late night cram sessions, though.”

“No?” 

“No, I was in love with the waitress who worked the night shift.”

Raising an eyebrow, Emily pushes a few stray hairs from her face. “Really… First crush?”

JJ laughs, winking at Emily across the booth. “Not by far, but she had just a little bit of a southern accent and her hair was the color of buckwheat honey.” She stops talking, lost in her memories. After a moment, she shivers and smirks at Emily. “Anyway, we hooked up at a frat party and then she dropped out to follow Ani Difranco on tour.”

“Wow,” Emily mutters, biting her lip. “College in the late ‘90s. I never got into Ani.”

“That’s what you got from that?” JJ asks her, reaching across the booth to hit Emily’s arm. “Ok, cool kid. Who would you have followed on tour in college?”

Emily sighs wistfully. “That’s easy. I would have been a Joan Jett groupie. I mean, if I hadn’t been so obsessed with proving my mother wrong by getting a criminal justice degree.”

“I think following Joan Jett on tour would have proved her wrong in a different way.” JJ looks at her milkshake and realizes that she never started drinking it. “Oh! Get a straw! Drink!”

Before she can even move, JJ pulls two straws from the small dispenser at the end of the table and throws one at her. JJ unwraps her own straw and sticks it into her milkshake. Wrapping her lips around the straw, she sucks hard, doing her best to inhale the thick shake. It takes a moment to coax it up the straw because of how thick it is, but when it hits her tongue, the strawberry flavor explodes in her mouth and she moans happily.

Swallowing, she tilts her face up to look at Emily, keeping the straw between her teeth. Emily hasn’t even unwrapped her straw yet. She’s just staring at her, cheeks pink and eyes sparkling. It’s a familiar look, one that says ‘I love you’ and ‘how are you real?’ and ‘you terrify me’ all at once. It makes JJ’s heart beat faster and the strawberry milkshake in her mouth suddenly tastes sweeter.

“What?” JJ mumbles. “Is there something on my face?”

“I love you,” is Emily’s whispered answer. “You’re beautiful.”

JJ blushes a deep red, but their waitress is setting their order of fried pickles on the table between them before she can say anything. They focus on their milkshakes as the waitress puts down a couple of small plates and two sets of utensils that are tightly wrapped in a cheap napkin.

“You ladies doing ok?” the waitress asks us. “Something wrong with the shakes?”

“Nope,” Emily says lightly, glancing at JJ. “We’re doing great, thanks.”

“Well, ok, then. Let me know if you need anything else. Your food will be out shortly.”

The waitress walks away, chuckling at the two of them, and Emily gingerly picks up a fried pickle. It’s an off-putting brown, fried in some sort of unrecognizable batter. JJ laughs at her as she sniffs it. Most days, Emily seems like everyone else (unless you smell her expensive perfume or look too closely at how nice her clothing is), but it’s times like this, when she’s faced with something so far out of her comfort zone, that her rich upbringing is very apparent.

“It’s a pickle, Emily,” JJ says, pushing Emily’s hand toward her face. “Just eat it!”

Emily takes a careful bit, face scrunching as she prepares to be disgusted. To her surprise, it kind of just tastes like a warm pickle and a little bit of bread. Straightening up, Emily hums happily and picks up another slice.

“This is pretty good!” she says, nodding toward the plate. “Eat one!”

JJ holds up a hand before Emily can put the pickles slice in her mouth. “Wait!” She picks up the small ramekin of spicy mayo. “Dip it.”

“What is it?”

“Just try it.”

“Jennifer….”

“Prentiss….” JJ widens her eyes and sticks out her bottom lip, making the face that Emily is powerless to resist. “Please? For me?”

Emily rolls her eyes. “Jesus Christ, fine.” She tentatively dips her pickle into the speckled, pink dip. Her face scrunches again, she eats the pickle, and then she brightens. “Not bad!”

JJ cackles at her, lifting her head from the milkshake just to give her a carefree, toothy grin. “Is it going to be like this the whole trip?”

“Uh, probably?” Emily shrugs as she dips another pickle into the sauce. “The more I try, the less I’ll hesitate, though. Just wait until we find something that _you_ refuse to try.”

“Oh,” JJ says, shaking her shoulders, “I’ll try anything once.”

Emily squints across the table at JJ, too amused to be worried about the public flirting. “Uh-huh, very funny, Jareau. Get it all out now before we see your mom. I don’t need her thinking I’ve corrupted her daughter.”

“She already thinks you corrupted me,” JJ says, moving pickles around to find the best one. “Remember our first Christmas? When she stayed at my old apartment and I slept on the pull-out couch?”

“You mean, when _we_ slept on the pull-out couch and you wanted to have sex and she wanted a glass of water in the middle of the night?”

JJ sticks her tongue out. “Yup! She thought I was a virgin before that. Waiting until marriage.”

“Really?” Emily thought for a moment. “Weren’t you almost 30?”

“I was indeed, but you were almost 40 and I was a sweet angel.” JJ flutters her lashes, trying to look innocent. “I would never have even _thought_ about sex before I met you.”

Emily snorts, small pieces of fried pickle spraying from her mouth. “Please! Half the shit we’ve done has been your idea!”

As soon as she says that, the waitress materializes at the end of the table, a plate in either hand. She smiles at them, setting their plates down. Both JJ and Emily are beet red this time, but the waitress just looks amused. Emily flashes her a tight smile, pulling her plate toward her.

“Can I get you ladies anything else?” the waitress asks them. “Napkins, maybe?”

“Oh god,” Emily mutters, her pale skin somehow turning even redder. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s ok, sugar,” the woman chuckles, patting Emily’s shoulder. “I’m only teasing. You ladies just holler if you need something.”

JJ smiles at her. “We will. Thanks.” The waitress leaves them be and JJ looks happily at her stack of waffles. She starts cutting them into perfectly symmetrical wedges. Glancing up, she sees that Emily’s blush is fading, but she’s staring at her meatloaf sandwich like it’s radioactive.

“Emily,” JJ sighs, “it’s a fucking sandwich.”

“I just-”

“Eat it or I will stuff it down your throat, so help me God, Emily. Eat the damn meatloaf.”


	3. Coffee and Kisses

JJ parks the car in the driveway of her childhood home, turning it off and sitting back. She hasn’t been home in almost six years, and it feels weird to even think of this house as ‘home’. The only house that has ever felt like home is the house she lives in with Emily. Everywhere else she’s ever lived just felt like a place she was staying. 

“Ooh,” Emily says softly, leaning forward to look up at JJ’s house. “So, this is the Jareau family home, huh? It’s-”

“If you say rustic, I’m breaking up with you.”

“...cute. I was going to say cute.” Emily grins at her, unbuckling her seatbelt. “I’m going to put a sweater on.”

She climbs out of the car and starts toward the back, looking around. As fun as it is to tease JJ about her rural upbringing, she really does think that the house is cute. It’s a two-story farmhouse, clearly decades old, if not older. The house is white, although the paint isn’t as clean as it used to be. A large porch wraps the house, empty except for a porch swing and a few large, green plants.

Around the house, the land is flat and brown. It's November, so anything they might use the sprawling fields for is dead now. It’s still pretty and Emily can see so much blue sky above them. In the afternoon light, it looks like a postcard. Emily takes a deep breath of the cool, fresh, country air and opens the trunk. 

Her suitcase is easily accessible, so she just unzips it and digs through for her black fleece sweater. She finds it quickly and tugs it over her head, accidentally pulling the hair tie out of her messy bun. Bending down, she picks it up from the ground and just puts it on her wrist. She should probably try and look nice for Sandy. 

Sighing, she shuts the trunk and walks toward the front door, running her hands through her hair. JJ is leaning against the front of the car, just looking up at the house. Emily stops beside her.

“Hey,” she says quietly, rubbing a gentle hand on JJ’s back. “You ok?”

JJ nods, not looking at her. Emily knows this face and knows that JJ isn’t going to tell her what’s wrong until she’s ready. “Yeah.” She hesitates, glancing at Emily with watery eyes. “Uh, it’s really not a big deal.”

“Ok,” Emily replies, shrugging casually. “You can tell me when you’re ready, but you do have to tell me.” She wraps her hand around JJ’s waist and pulls her close. “Remember what the therapist said? No more keeping it in.”

Blinking, JJ smiles at her, their eyes meeting. The look that passes between them is filled with meaning, trust and support. It holds a history of late night panic attacks, screaming matches, and week-long silences, but the bad memories only add weight to their determination to love the other fully. Their relationship is heavy with choices - choices to be kind to themselves, to be patient with each other, to communicate no matter what. JJ wipes her eyes and sighs heavily.

“I feel…” Her head tilts back to look at her bedroom window. “I worked really hard to get out of here and it feels so...weird to be back, you know? The way the air smells, the pre-frost chill, even the dying grass - it makes me want to run for the hills.”

“We don’t have to see Sandy,” Emily offers, grinning. “I’m fine with that.”

JJ chuckles, smacking Emily’s stomach with the back of her hand. “We’re not bailing on my mom. Come on, Emily.”

“It was worth a try.” Emily’s pinkie finger sneaks under JJ’s shirt to brush against the silk soft skin of JJ’s side. “So, we’re not running?”

“No,” JJ answers, knowing as she says it that it’s true. “I shouldn’t have run the first time. It’s hard to be back here, but… I have to face it sometime, you know? It’s all in my head right now. If I see it in person, then I know what’s real and what’s my anxiety.”

Emily kisses JJ’s temple. “You’re so strong. Just let me know if you need to leave and I’ll have the car running before you can even hug your mom goodbye.”

Turning into Emily, JJ hugs her tightly, pressing her face into Emily’s raven hair and breathing deeply. “You’re so good, Emily Prentiss. I’m so lucky to have you.”

“No,” Emily says, running a hand down JJ’s hair, “I’m the lucky one.”

The front door opens and the women look up as Sandy walks out onto the porch grinning. JJ pulls away from Emily quickly, the memory of being caught in bed with her eight years ago still fresh. Chuckling at the blush on JJ’s cheek, Emily just follows her toward the porch.

“Jennifer!” Sandy exclaims, holding her arms out. “Give me a hug!”

“Hi, mom,” JJ laughs. She jogs up the porch steps and wraps her arms around her mom. “It’s good to see you.”

Her mom hums, squeezing her close. “It’s so good to see you! How long can you stay?”

“Only an hour or so,” JJ replies, pulling away. She turns to look back at where Emily is standing nervously at the bottom of the porch steps. “Someone made us late leaving this morning.”

Emily smiles apologetically and shrugs. “It’s not the first time.”

“I’m sure,” Sandy says quietly, returning the smile. “Come on, you get a hug, too.”

“Yes,” Emily cheers, hurrying up the stairs and hugging Sandy. “It’s good to see you, Ma’am.”

JJ grins at the friendly, if awkward, hug. It might be a little mean of her, but she loves the tentative truce between her mother and her girlfriend. They are incredibly different types of people, but they’re united in their love for JJ and that’s all that matters, really. Her mother likes that Emily takes care of her and makes her happy and Emily knows how important her mother is to her. So, they do their best despite their differences.

When they separate, Sandy leads them inside and Emily immediately starts looking around, committing everything to memory. She takes in the old, but well-kept furniture and the pastoral art on the walls. They walk into the small living room. It’s clean and cozy, and Emily instantly feels at home.

She knows why JJ hasn’t wanted to come home, but she’s also glad they decided to stop. JJ doesn’t get to see her mom enough and Emily knows that seeing the house in such good condition will make her feel better about that. Sandy seems happy and JJ will see that.

“Have a seat,” Sandy says to them, gesturing to the couch. “I’ll get you some coffee.”

“Thank you,” Emily replies quickly.

She sits on the couch, right up against the arm, so JJ can decide how much distance to put between them. Sandy smiles at Emily’s attempts to be casual and heads into the kitchen. Grinning, JJ sits down beside Emily.

“Relax,” JJ tells her, patting her leg. “She’s probably over it by now.”

Emily raises her eyebrow. “Then why did you jump away from me when she stepped outside? I saw your blush.’

“Well,” JJ tries, “there’s no need to _remind_ her.”

They laugh at themselves, hands coming together. Sandy walks back into the room carrying a wooden tray with three mugs, a few sugar packets, and a small glass of milk. She sets it on the coffee table and takes a seat across from them.

“So, what prompted the trip?”

“Mandatory vacation,” JJ answers, scooting forward on the couch so she can make herself a cup of coffee. “We had a lot of time off, so Hotch made us use it.”

“But why a roadtrip?” she asks, watching JJ put too much sugar into her mug. “Surely you’re tired of traveling?”

Emily just shrugs. “We never get to travel for pleasure and there’s so much of the country that I’ve never seen. We wanted to do something new together. Make memories that are just about us.”

Smiling, JJ pours a splash of milk into the mug of coffee and hands it to Emily before starting on her own mug. “We also knew that we’d go stir crazy if we just stayed home.”

“I can imagine,” Sandy says, looking at Emily as she takes a sip of the coffee JJ made for her. It was so effortless and spoke to so much familiarity. “How is the new house?”

“It’s great!” Emily reaches for JJ’s hand as soon as she sits back on the couch again. “We’re still making it feel like home, but it’s everything we wanted.”

“How’s the commute?”

JJ listens to the two of them talk, content to sip her coffee and stay quiet. Emily and her mother talk about the new house, work, and holiday plans. It’s probably the most they’ve ever spoken. JJ isn’t quite sure how she feels about that.

Emily is a part of her adult life, someone that is entirely unconnected to her past. She reminds JJ that she’s actually out of this tiny town and doing something with her life. JJ likes that Emily only knows about her childhood through stories and pictures, that she doesn’t have to push past the image of JJ as a sad, scared child to see her as she is now. 

Her mother is doing better about seeing the woman she is now, but it’s colored by their history. That’s probably normal for parents and children. Still, JJ doesn’t like the way she always looks a little sad. When her mother looks at her, she sees the past.

Setting her mug down on the tray, JJ stands. Emily immediately starts to put her cup down, too, but JJ waves her off. “I’m going upstairs. Stay here and keep talking.”

“You sure?” Emily asks her, brow furrowed with concern.

“Yeah.” Smiling at her, JJ nods. “I’m fine.”

She leaves them in the living room and heads for the staircase. Going through the motions of heading to her bedroom stirs memories in her, making her stomach twist. As she climbs the stairs, she thinks of all the times she came home late after soccer practice, or after her shift at the Waffle House, or after a study session at the library. 

Her body remembers the exhaustion of being a teenager, desperate to leave all of this behind and move to the big city. The walk down the hallway to her bedroom brings back phantom pain in her knees from running, her hands from writing, her head from crying. It’s overwhelming to open the door to her childhood bedroom and step into the past.

It looks exactly like it did when she graduated college and shut the door for the last time. The walls are a dusty pink and the windows are covered with yellowing lace curtains. Her small twin bed still has her blue comforter with the yellow flowers covering it. She looks at her vanity, noticing the clean mirror.

Walking further in, she runs her finger over the white metal bed frame and inspects it for dust. It’s clean. Her mother must clean her room periodically, keep it ready for use. The thought makes JJ’s heart clench with guilt. Her mother wants her to visit more. Of course, she would always bring Emily and the twin bed is way too small for the both of them. JJ barely fit in it when she visited during college.

There’s a soft knock on the door frame and JJ looks over her shoulder to see Emily standing in the hallway. Emily’s looking around the room, eyes lingering on the poster of Mia Hamm that has been taped to the ceiling above JJ’s bed since she was 11. She looks at JJ, waiting for permission to enter.

“It’s okay,” JJ says, sitting on her bed. “Come in.”

Emily walks into the room, hands tucked into the pockets of her sweatpants. “Wow,” she breathes, holding back a smile. She sees the plastic horses sitting on JJ’s vanity and the smile breaks free, spreading across her face. “It’s exactly like I pictured it.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I don’t know.” Emily wanders over to the window, carefully moving the curtains aside to peer outside. “It means that I always knew you were secretly a horse girl.”

JJ snorts, shaking her head. “Yeah, I guess I was.”

She takes in the way Emily’s black hair and clothing contrasts the pastel-colored room. JJ tries to imagine what it would have been like to go to high school with her. Would she have been scared of Emily? Or would she have seen the way her eyes sparkled and known that they were the same? What would Roz have thought of Emily? JJ thinks they would have gotten along really well.

“It’s a nice room,” Emily says, pulling JJ back to the present. “I bet you had a million dance parties in here. Any fun make-out stories?”

“No,” JJ chuckles. She crosses her legs on the bed. “My sister died, then my father left, and then I was busy working and studying to be the Valedictorian and later I was captain of the soccer team. There was no making-out.”

Emily sighs, putting her hands on her hips. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think about that. I shouldn’t have asked about… Sorry.”

“Come here.” JJ holds her hands out and waits for Emily to step between them. She holds Emily’s hips and brings her forward, smiling when Emily puts her hands on her shoulders. “We can talk about my childhood. I want you to know everything about me. It’s just don’t have fun stories like you do.”

“I don’t know if I’d call _all_ my stories fun,” Emily mutters. She brushes her hands over JJ’s hair. “Is it bad that I’m relieved to know you haven’t kissed that many people?”

JJ rolls her eyes, but she smiles at the admission. “I kissed a few people in college, but yes, you’ve definitely overshadowed anyone else.”

“Ooh.” Emily’s eyes lit up. “Am I your first love, Jennifer Jareau?”

The question is so unexpected that JJ turns a dark red, her mouth falling open. “What?” 

Pulling out of JJ’s grasp and sitting beside her on the bed, Emily grins, her tongue peeking out between her teeth. “I am! I’m your only love!”

“Emily!” JJ squeals, shoving her and making her fall back onto the bed. “You’re so full of it!”

“JJ loves me more than you!” Emily tells the poster of Mia Hamm, pointing a smug finger upwards. “You may be an internationally renowned soccer star, but I own Jennifer’s heart, so ha!”

Laying on the bed beside her, JJ throws an arm over Emily’s waist, giggling. “You’re so dumb sometimes.” Emily looks at her and JJ plants a kiss on her lips. “It’s not fair that you’re the only person I’ve loved, but I have to settle for being the latest in a long list.”

A shadow passes over Emily’s face and her grin fades. JJ suddenly feels like she said something wrong when Emily blinks and looks back up at Mia Hamm. Her hands rest on JJ’s arm, keeping it in place.

“It’s not a long list,” Emily says quietly. “I don’t know that there’s a list at all. If I had to make one… I guess Michael is on it, but that was a different kind of love. Johnny...No. I never loved him. There wasn’t anyone in college. I mean, that I cared about. Doyle… I don’t know. I wasn’t me then. He didn’t know me and I knew that. I think I _wanted_ to love him, but I didn’t.” She finally looks at JJ again. “Then, there’s you.”

JJ’s lips twitch as she tries to keep herself together. Her heart is so full of emotions that she can’t identify any. “There’s me.”

“Yeah.” Rolling onto her side, she cups JJ’s cheek, brushing her thumb over soft skin. “There’s you. I love you. I can say that like it’s a fact, because it is. It’s the only thing I’m sure of in the entire world. There’s not a list. It’s just you.”

Surging forward, JJ crashes their lips together, pouring everything in her heart into Emily’s eager mouth. Emily’s hands are clutching her face and she’s holding Emily’s body close with strong arms around her waist. The taste of salt is strong on their tongues as happy tears stream from their eyes.

Emily gasps against JJ’s mouth, feeling exposed and vulnerable and safe in her girlfriend’s arms. She wants to be closer to JJ even as they’re pressed against each other completely. Her body is burning, heart racing, but she feels like she’ll die if she lets go.

“I love you,” she whimpers, the words muffled by soft lips. “I love you.”

JJ nods, eyes closed, and pulls away just enough to breathe. “Emily,” she says instead of ‘I love you’, but it sounds exactly the same.


	4. Milk and Honey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a short one, but the next one? long and sexy

JJ opens the front door and walks out of the house into the chilly late afternoon air, turning to wait for her mom and Emily. They successfully navigated a family visit, but JJ is ready to get back on the road. She announced it was time to leave the second her mother mentioned children. Thankfully, a roadtrip is a great excuse to leave.

“It’s so great to see you,” her mother is saying to Emily as they walk out of the house. “We’re doing Thanksgiving at your new house, right?”

Emily looks at JJ, eyes filled with panic, but she says, “If we don’t have a case, then of course!”

“We’ll let you know, mom,” JJ chuckles. She steps forward for a hug, smiling as her mom holds her close. “I’m happy you’re doing well.”

Her mom moves to Emily, giving her an enthusiastic hug. Emily has to admit that Sandy’s hugs feel exactly like a mom’s hug should. Reluctantly, she starts to pull away, but Sandy holds her in place for a moment longer.

“Thank you,” Sandy whispers into Emily’s ear. “You’re so good for her. I want you to have my blessing and this.”

She presses something small and circular into Emily’s hand as she pulls away and Emily knows what it is without having to look. Head jerking up as she blinks back tears, Emily mumbles something that sounds like ‘thank you.’ Sniffing sharply, she jogs down the porch steps to the car before she can embarrass herself.

JJ watches Emily practically run away and frowns at her mom. “What did you say to her?”

“You’ll find out soon enough,” her mom answers cryptically. “Now get going. You have a long drive still.”

Still skeptical, JJ kiss her mom on the cheek and heads to the car. If her mother said something rude, Emily wouldn’t hesitate to say something rude back. JJ knows that from experience. So, she decides to let it go. Emily will tell her later anyway.

Emily is already in the passenger seat, shoes thrown carelessly into the back. JJ climbs in beside her and slips her flip-flops off. She waves good-bye to her mother as Emily reverses out of the driveway.

They spend the next hour driving without a map and talking about nothing at all. As long as they keep heading northwest, then they’ll be ok. After a while, they fall silent, content to just sit together and enjoy the scenery.

At some point, JJ starts digging through her backpack. She pulls out several maps, shuffling through them until she finds the one labeled ‘Ohio.’ When she starts to unfold it, Emily laughs at her.

“Seriously,” Emily asks, chuckling. “You know we have GPS on our phones, right?”

“It’s not the same!” JJ replies defensively. The map is huge and blocks Emily’s view of the side mirror. “I loved looking at maps as a kid, didn’t you?”

Emily shakes her head, memories of desperately trying to pretend she was somewhere else coming back to her. “Uh, no. Actually. I mean, we traveled so much that I eventually just stopped trying to figure out where I was.”

“Oh.”

If Emily looks at JJ, she’s going to see kind and sympathetic eyes, so she stares at the car in front of her. Sometimes, she forgets that her life before JJ is full of bad memories. She is so happy now that she can’t imagine being back in that dark place.

“I have a confession,” she admits quietly. “I feel guilty that I can’t show you a childhood bedroom. I don’t have any way to share my history with you. I don’t even have photos. I mean, personal photos. You’ve seen the publicity pictures of my mom, but it’s not the same.”

JJ sighs, folding the map as she tries to figure out what she wants to say. She knew something was going through Emily’s head. Somehow, she isn’t surprised to find out what it is.

“You don’t need pictures or a house to share your history with me,” JJ tells her gently. She tosses the map to the floor and twists in her seat to look at Emily. “The ghosts of our past don’t live in objects. They live inside us.”

Emily reaches a hand out and JJ takes it immediately. Their fingers thread together, making Emily feel tethered to something real. JJ always grounds her, keeps her in the present, stops her from falling into the dark places of her mind.

“Did you really learn anything new about me from that house?” JJ asks her.

Shrugging, Emily flashes her a cheeky grin. “I learned that you used to masturbate to Mia Hamm.”

“Oh, god.” JJ throws Emily’s hand away, laughing. “I thought we were having a moment!”

They laugh together and Emily feels the tension drain from her. She knows that JJ is right. The blonde woman knows more about her than anyone else does. JJ might know her better than she knows herself.

“Thank you,” Emily says, tapping her thumbs on the steering wheel. “I just wish I had better memories sometimes.”

“We’re making those better memories.” JJ looks out the window at the landscape around them. The sun is beginning to set and the sky has started turning a lazy pink. “I know that I’ve been happier in the last eight years with you than I was for the entire 30 years before. Besides, we have a house now. It won’t be _our_ childhood home, but, eventually, our kids will bring their partners home to show off old posters and plastic horses.”

JJ realizes after she’s said it that she mentioned having kids as if it is an inevitability. They had casual conversations about it before, but they never went anywhere. They’re both starting to get up there in years, so if they’re going to have kids, it would have to happen soon.

“Yeah,” Emily says calmly as if she didn’t hear her girlfriend’s nervous gasp. “We’ll give them a home they’ll want to come back to.”

They fall back into an easy silence after that, each lost in her own thoughts. Even though they only left home that morning, both women already feel a little changed. Just having this time together, without company or killing, reminds them that there’s more to life than just that.

Emily thinks about how rare it is for them to have so much time without distractions. She suddenly realizes just how much they’re going to have to make conversation. What if they run out of things to talk about? She starts looking around for something to talk about.

Her eyes land on a roadside stall with a large sign that reads “Homemade Honey!” She immediately checks her mirrors and starts changing lanes. They’re close to the only ones on the road, so it only takes her a couple sections to get all the way to the right. She slows and pulls over onto the side shoulder. JJ looks at her, frowning.

“Why are you pulling over? Is something wrong?”

“No!” Emily answers, grinning. “Something is so right. Hand me my wallet!”

JJ still isn’t sure what’s happening, but she digs through her backpack. Emily is tapping her shoulder impatiently, making her laugh. Emily’s enthusiasm is infectious and JJ finds herself excited about whatever has Emily acting like a child.

She finally pulls out the expensive, Italian leather wallet and Emily snatches it from her hands. She leaps out of the car and runs toward the rickety-looking, faded red stall. Despite the fact that it looks like it could fall apart at any second, the stall has clearly stood the tests of time. 

Emily looks over the various sized jars of honey. They range from a cup to a quart, each labelled “Honey!” It seems out of place on the side of the road in Ohio, but Emily thinks it might just be a sign that they’re heading in the right direction. She spots a heavy ceramic mug with a lid and opens her wallet.

“Is this sanitary?” JJ asks her, leaning past her to take it all in. 

“Who cares?” is Emily’s reply. She shoves five 20-dollar bills into the ceramic jar. At JJ’s judging look, she scoffs. “What? How much money do you think they make with this? I’m just helping them out!”

JJ chuckles and holds her hands up in surrender. “I wasn’t judging your charity. I’m just worried that you’re going to take $100 worth of honey.”

“Oh, please.” Emily puts the ceramic jar down and turns her attention back to the honey. “Not even I need that much honey.”

JJ isn’t so sure about that, but she keeps her thoughts to herself and just watches as Emily tries to choose a mason jar. She keeps reaching out for a jar and then taking her hand back. It’s like all the choice has overwhelmed her. JJ picks up a small jar that fits perfectly in the palm of her hand and gives it to Emily.

“Here,” JJ says. “How about this one?”

Emily turns a smile as bright as the sun on her and JJ blinks, cheeks warming. She’s not sure what she did to earn such a big smile, but JJ finds herself smiling back. Emily takes the jar, opening it with a click.

“Thank you,” she says, lifting the jar to her nose. “I was panicking.”

“I could tell.”

JJ starts to laugh, but the sound catches in her throat when Emily sticks her tongue into the honey, moaning at the sweetness. Emily’s eyes flutter closed as the honey coats her tongue. She swallows it, feeling the sweetness burst in her mouth and slide down her throat. It reminds her of bright summer days in the French countryside and her first kiss with Madeline, the beekeeper’s daughter.

Opening her eyes, Emily remembers where she is and who she’s with. She looks at JJ, admiring the way the setting sun sets her blonde hair on fire and the way her blush colors her face. She takes a step forward, heart pounding in her chest, and kisses her girlfriend.

JJ’s surprised gasp lets Emily push her tongue forward, filling JJ’s senses with the taste of honey. Hands flying up to clutch Emily’s sweatshirt, JJ sighs happily, everything around them fading away. The kiss only lasts a moment, but both women are breathless when they pull apart.

“That’s good,” JJ murmurs against Emily’s sticky-sweet lips. “Get a few.”

Grinning, Emily shimmies her shoulders, winking flirtatiously at JJ. “Yeah? Are you having some less than sanitary thoughts.”

“Shut up,” JJ laughs, snatching two more jars of honey and heading back to the car. “You’re so stupid.”

“You like it!” Emily calls as she jogs after her. “You like that I’m a horny idiot!”

JJ just rolls her eyes and climbs into the car. She does, in fact, like that Emily is a horny idiot, but she’s never going to admit it. Emily would let it go right to her head. Well, maybe she’ll just wait until they get to their hotel room in Chicago and then tell Emily.

“I hear that beautiful brain working,” Emily says as she pulls back onto the highway. “I’m going to be in a world of trouble tonight, aren’t I?”

“You have no idea, honey.”


	5. Honey and Waffles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short chapter to get this story moving again!

“Wrong again!” JJ groans as they pull into their hotel’s parking garage. “Edward breaks the bed on their honeymoon. Not back at Bella’s house! Come on, you’ve seen these movies a million times.”

Emily just rolls her eyes, relieved beyond words that they’re finally in Chicago and the Great Twilight Sporcle Quiz of 2020 is finally over. For tonight anyway. Somewhere in Indiana, JJ decided to test whether or not Emily actually retained any information from watching all the movies. She had not.

“It’s not about the quantity of views,” Emily sighs, turning the car off and getting out. “I don’t really watch them for the content.”

She walks to the back of the car while JJ gets her backpack and follows her. “Why even watch it with me if you care so little?” JJ asks her, appearing at her side while she opens the trunk. “You didn’t even know Bella was in high school.”

“Because you like them and I like how happy you are when we watch them together.”

A rush of love fills JJ and she has to look away from Emily’s sheepish smile and affectionate gaze. She just focuses on getting their bags. Sometimes, JJ can barely believe that Emily loves her. It feels like she’ll never be able to prove how much she loves the black-eyed woman back. No one else would have watched her favorite movies so much, just to see her happy.

“I’ll take these,” Emily says, taking their suitcases. “Why don’t you just focus on liaising with the front desk, huh?”

JJ laughs and closes the trunk. “You’re so pretentious. I haven’t liaised in years.” They start for the elevator, JJ hooking her thumbs around the straps of her bag. “Just for that, I’m going to make <i>you</i> talk to the front desk and ask for the keys.”

“Please don’t,” Emily gasps, shuddering. She presses the button for the elevator with wide eyes. “Don’t make me talk to strangers.”

“You talk to strangers all day at work.”

“I know, and it’s exhausting.”

JJ eventually buckles under Emily’s full-lipped pout and talks to the front desk. Emily does still have to pull her ID and credit card out, but she stands behind the blonde the entire time. In her sweatpants and hoodie, Emily looks like an overgrown sullen teenager. JJ shares a sympathetic smile with the desk clerk and drags her back to the elevators.

As soon as the doors close them in and JJ hits the button for the 12th floor, Emily closes the distance between them, pressing JJ into the mirrored wall. Pressing a flurry of kisses over JJ’s face, she draws out a soft giggle and starts unbuttoning JJ’s cutoff jean shorts. Annoyingly, the elevator arrives on their floor extremely quickly.

“Go!” JJ laughs at her, pushing her away. “The sooner we get to the room, the sooner you can touch me.”

Emily doesn’t need any more convincing than that and drags the suitcases down the hall. She stops impatiently in front of their door, bouncing on her toes as JJ pulls the room key out of her pocket and bumps it against the electronic doorknob. Emily’s body is pressed flush against hers and, when the door finally opens, they stumble forward.

JJ quickly moves away from Emily, avoiding a spill to the floor. She laughs as she hops onto the closest bed, landing easily. Taking her backpack off and unzipping it, she watches as Emily leaves their suitcases and looks at JJ with laser focus.

“So?” she asks, licking her lips and holding her hands out. “What first?”

“Take your clothes off,” JJ orders, pulling a jar of honey from her backpack. She sets it on the bed and tosses her backpack onto the small desk in the corner as she stands. “Everything off and then lay on the bed.”

Emily starts stripping eagerly. They have so much time on this trip and it doesn’t seem real. She knows that JJ will take her time, take what she wants from Emily, and then they’ll get to sleep late. Emily might be as excited for the sleep as she is for the sex.

Once she’s naked, she jumps onto the bed, laying on her back and getting comfortable. She slowly trails her fingers over her stomach as she watches JJ undress. The younger woman is impossibly beautiful, even in the harsh hotel light. She pulls her shirt over her head, revealing a lacy white bra. Then, she opens her jean shorts and lets them fall, a matching pair of underwear sitting low on her hips.

“Have I told you that you’re beautiful today?” Emily asks breathlessly. “Because you are.”

JJ rolls her eyes, her blush betraying her. She doesn’t bother answering and just kneels on the bed, making her way forward to sit between Emily’s legs. Emily pays her compliments constantly, but their effect never lessens. JJ always feels lucky to have a beautiful woman call her beautiful.

Opening the jar of honey with a pop, JJ drops the lid onto the bed out of the way. She locks eyes with Emily as she dips her pinkie into the jar. The thick liquid streams from the finger when she lifts it out and she quickly moves to her mouth. Some honey stretches between the jar and her pink lips, landing on her stomach.

Emily sits up quickly, gripping JJ’s hips and dragging her tongue up the thin line. She can taste the sweetness of the honey and the slight sheen of sweat on JJ’s skin. It is intoxicating and she looks up at JJ with wide eyes, mouth watering.

JJ’s blue eyes are dark with lust. She yanks her finger from her mouth and kisses Emily, their tongues sliding together. JJ’s world narrows to where their mouths connect. The only thing she knows is the way Emily’s mouth moves against her and the soft whimpers that escape her dark lips. Heat pools between her legs and she breaks the kiss with a gasp.

“I told you to lie down,” JJ reminds her, using her free hand to push her away. “Be good, or I’m just going to sleep.”

Even though Emily knows it’s an empty threat, she obeys, more than willing to be good for her girlfriend. She lays down, spreading her legs wide, so JJ can scoot forward and press their hips together. Resting her hands on the pillows, Emily just looks up at JJ, giving control over completely.

“We’re going to end up so sticky,” JJ laughs, dipping two fingers into the jar. “Don’t let me fall asleep without a shower.”

Emily just nods. She agrees readily now, but she knows that when they’re done, she’s going to be completely useless. It doesn’t really matter. They’re in no rush to be anywhere and they can just take a longer shower in the morning. JJ pulls her fingers from the jar and Emily stops thinking entirely.

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JJ wakes up the next morning, slowly sucking in air and stretching her arms over her head. With her eyes closed, she relaxes down onto the bed again, pushing her hips back against Emily. Her body is a little sore from the night before, but it feels good to get some exercise after sitting in a car for most of the day. Today, sitting in the car again would feel good because she was sore.

Sniffing, Emily throws an arm around JJ and hugs her closer. They’re both feeling lazy, even though they know they need to get back on the road. The bed is just so warm and they’re just too comfortable to move.

Emily nuzzles her face into JJ’s hair, breathing deeply. The blonde woman still smells sweet as honey, but it’s mixed with the rose-scented shampoo that Emily brought along. She isn’t about to spend two weeks on the road without her creature comforts. Besides, it gives her an excuse to smell JJ without being weird.

“You’re being weird,” JJ mumbles, rolling over. She wraps her arms around Emily’s waist, kissing her lightly. “Do I smell good, at least?”

“Sweet as honey,” Emily answers with a cheeky smile. She pushes a thigh between JJ’s legs and rests her forehead against JJ’s. “Although, you do have morning breath.”

Scoffing, JJ pushes Emily away playfully, barely moving away. “That’s so rude. I offer you morning kisses and you insult me.”

Emily laughs, covering JJ’s face in messy kisses. Her breath probably doesn’t smell any better than JJ’s, but the blonde woman doesn’t pull away. Instead, she kisses her girlfriend, leaning into her and gently pushing her onto her back. Their bare skin stuck together, slightly sweaty from sleeping naked under all the covers fresh out of the shower.

Despite the vigorous activity the night before, they made it to the shower and got a couple more rounds in. Even after all of that, both women would happily go another few rounds before they hit the road. Tearing her mouth away from JJ’s, Emily reaches for her phone on the bedside table, grinning as JJ switches her attention to Emily’s neck.

Hitting the lock button, Emily sees that it’s just past 9am - 2 hours after they were supposed to be up. She groans, putting her phone down and looking at JJ again. JJ kisses her, biting her lip softly.

“We’re behind schedule,” Emily tells her, words slurred as JJ sucks on her bottom lip. “We still have to eat breakfast.”

“There’s a buffet.”

“We missed it.”

With a disappointed sigh, JJ finally rolls off Emily, sitting up. “Dang. I guess we have to eat somewhere else. I’m pretty sure I saw a Waffle House.”

Emily snuggles back into the blankets as she watches JJ french braid her hair. “I’ve never eaten at a Waffle House.”

“What?” JJ gasps, snapping her head around to stare at Emily with bewilderment. “But… It’s Waffle House!”

Rolling her eyes, Emily sits up, too. She smiles when JJ’s eyes drop to her chest, looking over the bite marks and bruises that she left behind. “Does my mother strike you as the roadtrip-and-Waffle-House type?”

Shrugging, JJ pulls her hairtie off her wrist and ties it around the end of her braid. “You could have gone in college, or afterwards.”

“Alas,” Emily sighs, leaning forward and resting her chin on JJ’s shoulder, “I did not.”

“Well, we’ll remedy that!” JJ throws the covers back and gets out of bed, throwing her arms out and cracking her back. “Come on! It’s time for waffles!”

Emily pouts, laying down again and burrowing under the blankets. “But it’s so warm! Can’t I just put honey on you and call it breakfast?”

JJ grins, crawling onto the bed and sitting beside Emily. “Mmm, that does sound good, but…” Suddenly, she yanks the covers off Emily, exposing her to the cool, hotel room air. “Get up!”

“You’re so mean!” Emily whines, even as a smile spreads across her face. “For that, you’re buying!”

“Sure!” JJ agrees readily. “Whatever it takes, baby. Now, let’s get a move on!”


	6. Glass Houses

Emily stares across the table at JJ, eyes wide. Her girlfriend is quickly making her way through her third waffle. Emily has eaten half of her tuna melt, but JJ is somehow bottomless pit. It’s frankly a little bit terrifying, but kind of hot at the same time. Deciding not to worry about it, she sipped her coffee and just watched.

They finally made it out of the hotel about an hour after waking up. JJ drove them straight to a Waffle House and ordered Emily a tuna melt and smothered hash browns. That’s when the waffle eating started.

“Amazing,” Emily mumbles, putting her coffee down.

JJ swallows her bite and frowns at Emily. “What?”

Shrugging, Emily smiles at her. “Nothing. I’m just wondering where it all goes. That’s a lot of carbs.”

“You got a problem with my ability to eat waffles?” JJ asks jokingly. She reaches for her strawberry milkshake and wiggles her eyebrows. “You usually don’t complain when I eat a lot.”

“Oh god.” Emily laughs, picking up her straw wrapper and throwing it across the table. “You’re incorrigible.”

JJ drinks her milkshake and winks at Emily. They don’t have too much time if they want to be in St. Louis by sundown. At the same time, this is their trip and they are allowed to do whatever they want. Knowing that helps them both relax, but it doesn’t change the fact that they’re used to keeping a tight schedule and want to hit the road.

Emily finishes her smothered hash browns with a wrinkle of her nose. It’s good food, but it’s not something she’ll probably ever eat again. Half of her tuna melt still sits in front of her, so she gives it her full attention and tries to work through it. 

JJ has a sharp eye on her, watching closely even as she continues to eat her waffle. Emily wonders if this is a  _ thing  _ for her. Watching Emily try new, less fancy food seems to be a new form of entertainment that JJ just discovered. Swallowing her mouthful of “comfort” food, Emily raises an eyebrow.

“Yes?” Emily asks, chuckling. “Can I help you?”

“You look like I’m torturing you,” is the teasing answer. JJ grins. “It’s just bread, tuna fish, and cheese.”

Emily sniffs delicately. “It’s not bad…”

“It’s just not what you’re used to?”

“Exactly.”

JJ sits back in her seat, finally finished with her food. “We can go somewhere nice in St. Louis,” she offers with a small smile. “I’ll let you make me try something I’ve never even heard of. How’s that?”

“Sounds good,” Emily replies, shrugging casually. She drops the act and grins at JJ. “I did like those hashbrowns, though. Can we get an order to go?”

“Yes!”

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“Tell me why our first stop after breakfast is another restaurant?”

JJ rolls her eyes, jumping forward to pull open the door. “It’s not a restaurant. It’s a soda store.”

“Oh, my bad.” Emily sticks her tongue out at her as she passes her. “Soda store.”

She looks around the store and sees that JJ’s description is apt. It looks exactly like any other convenience store that she’s ever been in. There are a few aisles, full of drink bottles, and the walls are lined with fridges, which are also full of bottles. She turns to JJ, unimpressed.

“Wow. This was  _ definitely  _ worth stopping for.”

Nudging Emily out of the way, JJ smiles at the cashier and leads them down an aisle. “There’s famous root beer here.” She stops suddenly and stares at Emily with wide eyes. “Please tell me that you’ve had root beer.”

Laughing, Emily just cups JJ’s face and kisses her quickly. “You’re an idiot. We’ve literally shared Root Beer Floats before.”

“I’m just checking,” JJ mumbles against Emily’s mouth. “I never know with you.”

Emily lets her go, wandering down the aisle and glancing over the options. “Alright. Let’s grab this world-famous root beer and hit the road again. I’m tired of this and I want to get to the next stop. This isn’t even a stop.”

“So snooty.”

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“Are you joking?” JJ squints up at the large windmill in front of her. “This is what you were in a rush to get to?”

Emily gestures for JJ to pose. “Come on. Look excited to be here.”

With a dramatic groan worthy of any put-out teenage girl, JJ turns to face Emily and gives her a tight smile. “Cheese.”

“Jennifer Jareau,” Emily sighs, lowering her phone so she could glare at her, “are you really going to deny Spencer his one request? He wants a picture of the windmill.”

“This is for Spencer?” she asks. Perking up a little bit, JJ holds up two peace signs and grins. “You should have led with that.”

Emily mumbles to herself as JJ poses, but she takes the picture. Her girlfriend should be happy to pose for her, even if it isn’t for Spencer. It doesn’t really matter, though. Emily doesn’t care about this windmill at all.

“Alright,” she says after she takes the picture, “we can go.”

“I don’t know…” JJ hums. “We’re here now… Maybe we should ask for a tour…”

Pinching her nose, Emily closes her eyes and prays for patience. “JJ. I swear to god-”

“What? You’re the one who wanted to stop.”

“Spencer asked for a photo!” Emily reminds her loudly. She shoves her phone into her pocket, stomps over to JJ, and grabs her arm. “We are not spending an hour on a tour of a fucking windmill.”

JJ lets Emily drag her away, laughing. “You are the grumpiest roadtripper in the world! So cranky!”

“Well, maybe I’m crashing after all that root beer.”

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“It’s the end.”

“No, this is the beginning.”

JJ glares at Emily. “Why would they put the Route 66 Museum at the  _ beginning of the route?” _

“So people know what to look forward to,” Emily answers easily. She takes a brochure from the unattended front desk and heads toward the museum portion. “You gotta know what’s coming.”

“I don’t think so,” JJ counters, following along. “I think it’s good to look back on everything and remember.” They walk through a small metal archway that reads ‘Lebanon. Our Town. Your Town.’ “Is that where we are? Lebanon?”

“Lebanon, Missouri.” Emily stops inside the museum. “Huh. We were both wrong.”

The museum is a small room with a few recreations of the 1950s. There’s a gas station at one end and a diner at the other. It’s cute and detailed, but there really isn’t anything too exciting to see. Emily smiles at JJ.

“This is cute!”

“Yeah! Let’s take some photos.”

The women spend a while taking photos like they’re pumping gas or playing pinball. Emily hops up onto the counter of the diner, sprawling out like she owns it. Her black denim overalls and red tank top actually kind of work with the picture and JJ imagines that she’s a leather wearing biker chick. When the picture is taken, JJ closes the space between them and kisses her.

“Whoa,” Emily breathes when JJ pulls away. “That kind of stuff is no good in the ‘50s. Or Missouri.”

“Who cares?” JJ chuckles, kissing her again. “Let’s blow this popsicle stand and make-out in the car like teenagers.”

Emily scrambled off the counter. “Okay!”

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“Well, I don’t know what I expected.”

“It  _ is  _ called John Patten’s Log Cabin. It’s a log Cabin.”

Emily winces. “I thought it’d be cool.”

“It’s a log Cabin,” JJ repeats with a sigh. “Take a picture and go?”

“Yeah.”

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Emily glares at the big house in front of them. It was supposed to be really cool, but it’s just a house. An old house, but a house nonetheless. She turns annoyed eyes at JJ, who blushes.

“Ok, but you took us to a log cabin.”

“It had history.”

JJ throws her hands toward the house. “This has history, too!”

“What?” Emily crosses her arms and cocks a hip. “What history? Tell me, Jennifer. What’s the cool history of this house.”

“It’s… Um…” Rolling her eyes, JJ digs her phone out of her pocket. “Hold on, I’ll look it up.”

With a scoff, Emily snatches her phone out of her hands and heads back to the car. “It’s not worth it. No more old houses, babe. From either of us.”

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“Jennifer Jareau, this is me dumping you.”

JJ grabs Emily’s hand, dragging her toward their next stop. “It’s not a house, Emily! It’s a farmstead!”

“Babe, I love you, but no.” Digging her heels into the ground, Emily does her best to walk away, but JJ is so damn strong and she just stumbles forward. “I know you’re from a farm, and this is probably really cool to you, but-”

“I’m not from a farm!”

“Then  _ why? _ ” Emily whines loudly as they get closer to the Caldwell Farmstead. “Why do we need to look at yet another old American house?”

JJ grins and says the only thing that could get Emily excited: “It’s haunted.”

Emily’s head whips around, mouthing falling open with surprise. “What?”

“Yeah, I put a house with real ghosts on the list,” JJ tells her, picking up speed. Emily goes with her finally and they make their way across the field toward the house. “I know it’s 3pm and that’s not a very spooky time, but still! Real ghosts!”

“I suppose,” Emily starts, laughing, “that we can stay together.”

“Oh good. I was really worried there…”

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“Can we get ice cream first?” JJ asks, shutting the car door. She pouts at Emily as she puts her sweater on, walking to the front of the car. “I want to make sure we have room.”

“Whatever you want,” Emily answers as if she wasn’t the one begging to stop and get something to eat. She tugs down the sleeves of her sweatshirt. “I’m done for anything.”

“You usually are.” JJ winks at her, linking their arms together and leading her out of the parking lot toward the Twistee Treat Ice Cream Stand. “I’m thinking chocolate.”

Emily just laughs good-naturedly. They make their way across the gravel lot to the ice cream stand that’s shaped like an ice cream cone. Beside it, a large brick building announces “ANTIQUES”. There’s also a massive statue of a shirtless man and a pink elephant (a reference to the name of the antique store) that is three times as tall as they are. It’s kitschy and corny and they love it.

“I want a picture with that man,” Emily tells her girlfriend. “I want it so bad.”

“Only if I can take a picture with the Alvin and the Chipmunks statues,” she replies, pointing across the lot at the uncanny figures. “That one looks like Spencer.”

“Deal.”

They get their ice cream from the bored teenage boy who wishes he was anywhere else. JJ does get chocolate, but Emily decides to be adventurous and gets butter pecan. It’s not her usual flavor, but it’s sweet and savory at once and she likes it.

Holding hands, they make their way to the Chipmunks. The cold weather keeps their ice creams together, so they can take their time. JJ hands hers over, making Emily hold both cones and juggle her phone to take a picture. JJ squats beside the Spencer-looking one and throws up two peace signs. Emily takes the phone, grinning at the ridiculous pose.

“Alright,” she says when JJ hurries back to her and takes her ice cream, “I’ll send it along.”

“Thanks!”

Taking Emily’s hand again, JJ leads her into the building. Immediately, they are overwhelmed by all the trinkets and antiques in the store. It’s impossible to take it all in at once, so they begin to walk around.

Quickly, Emily finds that JJ actually loves kitschy things. She keeps picking up small ceramic birds and creepy child figurines. Finding a large porcelain leaf, she holds it up with an excited gasp, showing it to Emily.

“Let’s get this!”

Emily winces, not wanting to say no to JJ, but not wanting that in their house either. “Uh… Where would we put it?”

“The coffee table,” JJ answers immediately. “It’s perfect for the candle lighter, our chapstick, the random nonsense we end up with.”

“Well…” Scanning the room, Emily’s eyes land on a doll that looks exactly like Penelope. “Why don’t we get that, instead?”

JJ follows her finger and gasps again. She puts the leaf down and heads across the room to the cluster of dolls that Emily spotted. They are all terrifying, but there seems to be one for each of their teammates. They agree to buy them as gifts.

When they walk out of the gift shop later with matching brain freezes from scarfing down their ice cream so they could carry the dolls, they’re laughing and walking so closely together that their shoulders keep bumping. It feels normal and nice to just wander around without a real schedule or a tragic reason to be traveling. Emily and JJ are always happy to be together and it’s wonderful to just  _ be  _ together.

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

“It’s just sticks.”

“Emily, it’s a henge.”

“A henge.”

“A Woodhenge. The Cahokia Woodhenge.”

“I’m going back to the car.”


	7. My North Star

JJ is leaning out the window, her arms stretched out as far as they can go and her hair whipping around wildly. It’s chilly outside, and the wind makes it even colder, but JJ is fine with that. She’s used to the cold after growing up in Pennsylvania and then moving to DC. So, the upper half of her body is hanging out of the car, only clothed in a sports bra, and her teeth are beginning to chatter.

Through the mess of her hair, she can see the storm brewing in the sky above them. It’s grey and darker than it should be at the beginning of sunset. After a week on the road, they’ve seen quite a few sunsets, but it seems like tonight’s will be obscured by thunderclouds and rain.

Something tickles at her stomach and she lifts herself, using her abs to curl up just a little bit. Emily is holding the front of her cut-off jeans. Her fingers are tucked into the worn lace waistband of JJ’s underwear, but she’s holding her shorts tightly, protectively. JJ smiles and relaxes again, comforted by the fact that Emily is there.

They’re somewhere in Oklahoma, making their way along the Route. It’s been nice and slow and sweet, with long talks about nothing at all. JJ can’t stop thinking about how easy it all is. She never thought she could have a relationship like this, with her best friend, someone who knows her entirely and still loves her unconditionally. Classic rock and roll drifts out of the car and gets snatched away by the wind.

Inside the car, Emily does her best to focus on the road, but JJ keeps distracting her. Her bare stomach draws her eyes like a magnet, abs flexing as she keeps herself horizontal. The dim light makes her skin gleam, her hair looks like streams of sunlight, and her body is warm against Emily’s hand. She can barely keep her attention on the road.

Emily wonders how she found someone who only brought light to her life. JJ makes her happier than anyone else ever has, bringing love and trust and truth. There are no secrets between them. It should terrify her, but it doesn’t. It makes their lives better.

A drop of rain hits the windshield. A moment later, a drop hits JJ’s forehead. She quickly drops back into the car, pouting when Emily takes her hand away. The rain picks up before she can say anything and she rolls the window up.

“Jesus,” she says as the sky breaks open and the music in the car is suddenly drowned out by the downpour. “Can you drive in this?”

Squinting to try and see better, Emily shakes her head. “I don’t think so.”

In less than 30 seconds, the entire world went white outside the car. She can’t see anything at all and she doesn’t want to put them in danger by trying to keep going. With a sigh, Emily puts on their hazards and pulls over to the side of the road. She waits until she feels the rumble of grass under the tires before parking the car.

“I think we’re off the shoulder,” she tells JJ. Taking her seatbelt off, she smiles at her girlfriend. “I guess we’re waiting it out.”

“Well, I’m getting in the back then,” JJ replies, shaking her head. She takes her seatbelt off and climbs into the backseat, thankful for Emily’s large car. “Wake me up when the rain stops.”

An idea comes to Emily and she twists in her seat, watching as JJ pulls her socks off and wiggles out of her shorts. She’s just in her sports bra and slightly fraying underwear. JJ lays down on the wide backseat, tucking her arms under her head and closing her eyes. 

With a grin, Emily climbs into the backseat, too. She carefully lays herself on top of her girlfriend, resting all her weight on the woman below her. Tangling her fingers in JJ’s hair, Emily kisses her.

JJ’s hands find Emily’s hips immediately. The rain is deafening, muting all the sound in the car, but from so close, JJ can hear Emily’s moan. Their kiss deepens and JJ pushes her tongue into Emily’s mouth and her thigh between Emily’s legs. The seat is a little too narrow for two grown women, but they don’t mind.

They’re too focused on making out like teenagers in the back of their parents’ car to care that Emily has to slip a leg off the seat to spread her legs enough. When JJ bucks her hips, pushing her thigh into Emily, they both groan. Emily groans because the pressure is perfect, but JJ groans because her girlfriend is wearing too much clothing.

“Take your pants off,” JJ whines, grabbing the waistband of Emily’s sweatpants and pushing them down. “I need you to be naked.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Emily jokes. 

She shifts, doing her best not to hit her head on the roof of the car as she wiggles out of her pants and underwear. JJ strips off the last of her clothing, too, watching closely as Emily pulls her shirt over her head and unclips her bra. Once they’re both naked, JJ sits up. She leans against the back of the seat and pulls Emily onto her lap.

Their mouths find each other again, messily crashing together. The car is cramped and their skin sticks to the leather seats, but JJ’s hands are digging into Emily’s hips and Emily’s hands are cupping her face and everything is wonderful. The women lose themselves, kissing deeply as their bodies warm.

“God, I feel like I’m 17 again,” Emily laughs, trailing her hands down JJ’s chest and cupping her breasts. “I hope the Ambassador doesn’t catch us.”

JJ moans loudly when Emily squeezes her breasts. She doesn’t have any memories like this one and it doesn’t upset her. Emily is the only one she cares about. She’s just as happy to make these memories at 38 as she would have been at 18. JJ is happy to do anything, as long as it’s with Emily.

“You’re so hot,” JJ sighs, sticking a hand between them so she can touch Emily right where she wants it. “How’d I get so lucky?”

With a strangled gasp, Emily’s hips jerk as JJ rubs her, fingers sliding easily over wet skin. She doesn’t have an answer to the rhetorical question because she knows that she is the lucky one. Spreading her thighs so JJ can get a better angle, she dips a hand down between them. When JJ shifts, so she can spread her legs, too, Emily bounces, hitting her head on the roof.

“Fuck,” Emily curses loudly, rubbing her head. “What the hell?”

“Sorry!” JJ laughs. She uses her free hand to cup the back of Emily’s head and bring her forehead down. Emily tucked her face into JJ’s neck. “There. Better?”

Emily just hums, sucking on sweating skin. Now that they’re settled again, she turns her attention back to touching JJ. Her hand finds JJ wet and ready and she slides two fingers into her. Her girlfriend moans into her ear, fingers stuttering against Emily before finding their rhythm again.

They pant against each other, moving together, and occasionally sloppily making out. The rain pounds down on the car, loud and dramatic. It runs down the windows and makes them feel like they’re in their own protected world. There is nothing but whiteness outside and love and desire inside. It’s like being inside a cloud, like being in heaven, and both women eventually come with a quiet sigh of relief.

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

A couple days later, they find themselves on the side of the road again. This time, it’s because the stars are crystal clear in the Texas sky above them and they’re overwhelmed by the need to look. JJ gives Emily a boost up onto the roof of the car, passes up a blanket, and then climbs up herself.

It doesn’t take long for Emily to reveal the depth of her knowledge about stars. It’s adorable and JJ immediately asks her to name every star in the sky. That’s a little much, but Emily can name a few constellations, and so she does.

“Ok, what about that one?” JJ points up at a cluster of stars. “What’s that called?”

Emily smiles and follows JJ’s finger up to the night sky. “That is Lyra the Harp. It’s Orpheus’ harp and it plays the most beautiful music in the universe.”

“That’s really cool.”

“I’m glad you think so,” Emily laughs. She pulls the blanket tighter around them. “It’s so nerdy.”

With a gentle laugh, JJ cuddles into Emily’s side, her legs laying over girlfriend’s and her arms wrapped around her waist. “You’re really nerdy, Emily. I love it.”

Hesitating, Emily swallows hard. She looks at JJ. “Do you? Sometimes, I worry that you’ll wake up one day and realize that we’re too different.”

“That will never happen,” JJ assures her. Leaning forward, she takes Emily’s face between her hands. “I love our differences. I love them just as much as I love our similarities. I’d go crazy if we were exactly the same, Emily. Who would call me out for avoiding hard conversations? Who would force me to eat new, weird, expensive food? Who would tell me about the stars?”

“Okay,” Emily sighes, smiling. “I love you, too. It’s a bad brain day, I guess.”

JJ kisses Emily’s forehead. “Brain kisses for my favorite brain.” She places a few more strategically before meeting Emily’s eyes again, searching their depths for any other doubts she can sooth. “Anything else?”

“Can I say something really cheesy?”

“Of course.”

“I think I was waiting my whole life to meet you,” Emily admits. She wraps her hands around JJ’s wrists, turning her face against a soft palm. “It’s been really hard for us, but… I don’t think I would believe that it was real if it had all been easy. Sometimes, I think about how all the bad stuff that I went through, that  _ we  _ went through, has made me the best person I could be. It brought me here and then it made me right for you.”

JJ’s breath catches in her throat and tears fill her eyes. They say ‘I love you’ easily and frequently, but it’s something else to hear Emily say something like this. She feels like she’s too full of love, like she’s going to burst at the seams to let it all out, like Emily is the key to unlocking her truth. Emily is avoiding her eyes, looking down at the blanket between them, and JJ knows she must feel so vulnerable.

“You are exactly what I need,” JJ whispers. She gasps for air and ducks to meet Emily’s terrified eyes. “You and I found each other at the perfect time and we did everything right. I never believed in soulmates, but you’re my other half. I love you now and forever, Emily Prentiss. Okay?”

“Okay.”

They kiss softly, pouring their love into each other, trading one soul for another. It’s too much and not enough and absolutely perfect. Emily knows that JJ will always chase away her shadows and JJ knows that Emily will always find her, no matter how lost in her head she is. They are meant to be.


	8. Still Waters Run Deep

Grunting, Emily lifts a picnic basket out of the back seat. They stopped at a national park in New Mexico, planning to have dinner outside of the car for once. It’s a freezing November evening, but they’ve been so cramped in the car for so long that they decided to brave the cold and eat outside. Emily is bundled up in a big puffy coat and her Uggs, ready to brace against the cold.

JJ appears beside her, similarly dressed, and holds a hand out for the basket. “I got it, babe.” She looks around the green area as Emily shuts the trunk. “There’s a pier,” she points out, nodding toward the lake. “Want to sit by the water?”

“Won’t that be cold?” Emily asks even as she starts walking. 

Winking at her, JJ shifts the basket to her right hand and takes Emily’s with her left. “We’ll just have to snuggle, I guess.”

They head for the pier, walking carefully along the grassy area. It’s beautiful out here. Most of the drive through New Mexico has been red and brown and dusty, but they found a little pocket of green, with tall trees and a big lake. During the summer, it’s probably full of life, but right now, no one but them is crazy enough to spend an hour outside just to eat diner takeout and gas station wine.

Their time on the road has only made Emily feel even more confident in their relationship. She was worried at first about being with JJ away from work and friends. They may have found that they only work in the context they’re used to, like work or home, but, thankfully, Emily and JJ don’t need any context at all. They can spend hours and hours doing nothing and never get tired.

Reaching the pier, Emily sticks her hands into her pocket, feeling the items she tucked away before getting out of the car. JJ jogs ahead, getting to the end of the pier and setting the basket down. She sits on the edge, feet dangling over the water.

JJ has always loved the outdoors. When she was younger, she’d walk around her grandmother’s farm and, during high school, she spent all of her free time on the soccer field or hanging out on the bleachers. In college, and after she moved to DC, she’d sit on fire escapes or balconies to get fresh air and go for jogs through the park. It was wonderful to be so far from a city and out in the fresh air.

“Alright,” Emily sighs, sitting beside her and leaning back against the post at the corner of the pier, “what are you subjecting me to today?”

JJ rolls her eyes, smiling. “You’re so dramatic. Have you disliked anything I’ve picked out for you?”

Emily purses her lips, but she knows she hasn’t. “Fine. I’ll try and sound enthusiastic.” Grinning, she gives JJ two thumbs up. “Jeepers, babe! I bet you got me something  _ amazing _ !”

“No need for that,” JJ laughs. She opens the basket and pulls out the wine first. “I got you something you’ll like.”

“We’ll see about that.”

Sticking her tongue out, JJ puts the wine down and pulls out a greek salad. Emily’s eyes light up. She holds her hands out, begging for the familiar food.

“A salad!” Emily laughs. “A real salad!”

JJ hands the salad over, deciding it wasn’t worth it to tease Emily anymore. “Only because you’ve been so flexible,” JJ tells her, giving her the salad and pulling a fork from the basket. “I appreciate you trying new things for me.”

“I know I’ve been grumbling,” Emily starts, opening her salad, the plastic cracking loudly across the quiet water, “but I’ve been having a great time. I like everything I’ve eaten.”

JJ smiles at her, kicking her feet lazily. She pulls a sandwich out of the basket before pushing the basket away. Setting the sandwich down onto the pier, she twists the wine bottle open, wincing as another loud plastic snap echoes around them.

“I know, Emily.” She takes a deep drink from the bottle, wincing as she swallowed the $7 wine. “God, that sucks.”

“Of course it does,” Emily replies, mouth full of olives and feta cheese. “So does this salad.”

They eat in silence, taking occasional sips of the cheap wine. One thing they’ve really learned on this trip is that sometimes silence is ok. Neither woman is particularly good at relaxing, even when they’re just laying on the couch or sleeping in. Their time away from the city, and their lives, has brought an appreciation for quiet and calm.

JJ thinks that she could be happy on the road forever. As long as she has Emily, and an internet connection, she could live away from the hustle and bustle of DC. Even as she thinks it, she knows it isn’t true. She would get restless quickly. Still, maybe she’ll try and convince Emily to take a vacation every year. It’s nice to just spend time together.

“We should do this again,” Emily says as if she read JJ’s mind. “We could go to Europe next time. Get you on  _ my  _ turf.”

“I was thinking the same thing,” JJ laughs, crumpling the empty sandwich wrapper in her hands. “Not Paris.”

“No,” Emily agrees, closing her salad. She hands it to JJ and watches as the blonde puts the trash into the basket. “Maybe Prague. Or Amsterdam.”

JJ bats her eyelashes, placing a hand against her chest in fake shock. “Are you trying to make me do drugs, Emily Prentiss? I’m a federal agent!”

“Oh, shut up,” Emily snorts, crossing her legs and sitting forward. “I know you’re not as innocent as you seem. You can’t fool me.”

She picks up the bottle of wine, taking a drink. They’ve emptied half the bottle and Emily knows that they’ll have to wait a little bit before hitting the road again. It doesn’t matter. They’re not in any rush to be anywhere. Besides, she still needs to work up some courage.

“Have I ever told you about how we’d go swimming in college?”

Emily raises an eyebrow and passes the bottle to JJ. “No.”

Giving Emily a quick half-smile, she drinks before speaking. “We used to go swimming all the time. I went to UPitt, so we were in the city, but we’d drive about 30 minutes west to this little spot. It was just a small creek, really, but it was deep and wide enough to be fun.”

“That sounds great,” Emily says, smiling. She takes the wine bottle back. “Did the lake remind you?”

“Yeah,” JJ confirms. She leans back on her hands, looking over the water. “I was just thinking about how you never know a moment is going to be special when you’re in it, you know?”

Emily nods, offering JJ the bottle again. She takes it and sits up, drinking deeply. Emily’s nervous about her plan, but she hopes that this will be a day to remember.

“What’s so special about swimming?” Emily asks. She winces when it sounds harsher than she intended. “I don’t mean that the way it sounds.”

“I know.” JJ hands the bottle back with a smile and falls back onto the pier to stare up at the darkening sky. “I’m not sure what makes me remember them. Nostalgia, I guess. There were these three guys in our group, David, Brian, and… I don’t remember, but they were always flirting with me. I never did anything with them. It was mostly obnoxious.”

Emily drinks from the wine, setting it in the circle of her legs instead of handing it back. “I’m sure.”

JJ is quiet for a while. Both of them lose themselves in the moment, letting the calm settle over them. The breeze off the lake is cold and pierces their thick coats, making them shiver. Around them, the quiet is heavy, their breaths and the occasional birdsong the only sounds. It feels like they’re part of something bigger than themselves.

“There was also Samantha,” JJ says suddenly. She sighs heavily, lifting her hands over her head and letting them fall onto the pier with a soft thump. “I forgot all about her.”

Emily only hums softly, a little sleepy from the warm wine and cold air. JJ takes the sound as permission to continue.

“She had the darkest hair I’d ever seen. Until yours, of course.” JJ’s head falls to the side and she smiles at Emily. “No one matches your hair. Or your eyes. She had dark eyes, too.”

“You’ve got a type.”

“I guess I do.”

They laugh together quietly. Sitting up with a groan, JJ turns to face Emily, crossing her legs, too. She takes the wine bottle back and takes a drink. Emily isn’t sure if she’s going to continue talking, but she’s content to wait in silence either way. After a few quick sips, JJ starts talking again.

“She smoked clove cigarettes,” JJ tells Emily with a smile. “I thought that was so cool. We used to share cigarettes in the back of Brian’s pickup. It sounds so trashy now, but… I don’t know. It felt important at the time. When we kissed, it always tasted like the cheap beer we paid Sam’s older brother to buy us. I felt like I was really starting my life.” JJ blinks, pulling herself out of her thoughts and shrugs. “I wonder what she’s up to now.”

Emily takes the bottle back and grins. “We could get Garcia to find out.”

“ _ No _ ,” JJ gasps, lightly smacking Emily’s knee. “I don’t need to know. Let me remember her the way she was.”

“I know. I get it.” Emily takes a drink, finishing off the bottle. “I have a girl like that.”

JJ’s eyebrows fly up. “Really? Who?”

“Josephine,” Emily says with reverence. “Her name was Josephine.”

“So, your type is… names that begin with J?”

Emily laughs, rolling her eyes. “My type is blue-eyed blondes. I’m not afraid to say it. Josephine had strawberry blonde hair and steel blue eyes. I met her in France.”

JJ takes the empty bottle, narrowing her eyes at Emily as she puts it into the picnic basket. “Of course you did.”

“I was on a hunting trip with my mother in the south of France,” Emily continues, ignoring JJ’s teasing. “I wandered away and ended up falling off my horse and twisting my ankle. My mother left me behind, of course, so I made my way to the nearest clearing and found a house there.”

“Are you sure this happened?” JJ asks skeptically. “It sounds like a fairytale.”

“It felt like it,” Emily agrees with a shrug. “Anyway, Josephine was the farmer’s daughter. They let me stay there for the night, in Josephine’s room, and we ended up sleeping together. I think we were 16? Around that.”

JJ smiles at Emily’s wistful tone. She’s not jealous of the way Emily is talking about Josephine. It’s actually very cute and JJ is happy that Emily had that experience. Emily is still a mystery to her in a lot of ways, but she loves fully and openly and easily and it’s one of JJ’s favorite qualities. Everyone is important to Emily, even a small town nobody like JJ.

“I love you,” JJ says, grinning. At Emily’s questioning glance, she tucks her hair behind her ears. “I just wanted to say it. I do. I love you.”

“Marry me,” Emily replies. When JJ gasps, Emily digs into her jacket pocket and pulls out a ring. “Marry me.” Shifting onto her knees, Emily sits in front of JJ as she covers her mouth with her hands. “This is your mom’s ring. Or, I mean, she gave it to me.” JJ’s eyes widen and Emily keeps talking. “I know it’s sudden, and we’ve only talked about it in passing, but JJ… You’re my whole world. I would literally be dead without you, and I want to be your wife. I want you to be  _ my  _ wife. I want to fill out stupid paperwork, and wear matching rings, and take your last name to piss off my mom.”

JJ laughs, dropping her hands. She’s crying and she knows that she’s red and blotchy, but she can only think about the hope in Emily’s eyes and the way the hand holding the ring is trembling. Of course she’s going to marry Emily. Of course they’re going to be wives.

“Yes,” JJ says, wiping her cheeks. “Yes, Emily. I’ll marry you!”

Emily kisses JJ, forgetting that she should put the ring on her finger first. She doesn’t care about doing things in the right order. She doesn’t care about anything but kissing JJ, kissing her  _ fiancée _ , and figuring out the fastest way to be married. Emily doesn’t care how it happens. She doesn’t think JJ will care either. It’s about them, together forever.


	9. The Beginning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! It's the last chapter! Thanks for sticking around, folks!

They hit the road immediately after that. JJ drives, setting her GPS for Vegas, while Emily calls Penelope. There’s a solid three minutes of screaming and yelling by Garcia before they find out that the team is in Vegas on a case and Garcia is already there. When she’s calm enough to listen, Emily starts giving her instructions.

“Penelope, go to a jeweler and get a pair of rings. We’re both size 6.”

“Of course you are!” Penelope squeals. “A match made in heaven.”

“Yes,” Emily laughs, “and you’re our angel. Now, pick a good chapel for us, so-”

“Wait!” JJ yells suddenly, hand shooting out to point at a road sign. “What about that?”

Emily’s eyes follow her finger and she quickly reads the road sign as they pass. “You want to get married at the Grand Canyon?”

Another squeal comes through the phone. “That’s so romantic! So much better than Vegas!”

“Who would officiate?” Emily asks.

“Me, silly,” Garcia answers immediately. “I’m officiated. Okay, wait. Let me think. I can have the license printed and bring it with me. I’ll get the rings. What else?”

Emily smiles, thrilled more than she’d admit that Garcia was so excited. “Can you book us a campsite?”

“Yes!” The sound of typing carries through the phone. “I’m on it, babe. I can’t believe my girls are getting married!! Ok. Let me get to work. I’ll meet you there!”

“Thanks, PG. It means a lot. We love you!”

“I love you! Bye, girl!”

“Bye, girl.”

Emily hangs up the phone, tossing it onto the dashboard and dropping her face into her hands. She can’t believe that they’re actually getting married, or that they’re going to get married in the middle of the night at the Grand Canyon. They didn’t have dresses, or flowers, or anything.

“Is this stupid?” Emily asks her future-wife, lowering her hands and turning in her seat to face her. “Are we just riding a post-vacation high? Should we wait for a real wedding?”

“Emily,” JJ laughs, reaching out to gently push Emily’s head, “calm down. I don’t need a big ceremony, do you?”

“No!” Emily shudders at the thought. “My mother would probably try and take it over. We’d end up with 200 people we don’t know.”

JJ nods, tapping her thumbs impatiently on the steering wheel, speeding up. “Exactly. I think my mom would have liked to be here, but we can throw a reception at the house when we get home. I just want to be married to you already. It’s time.”

“It’s time,” Emily repeats, grinning. “You’re right. Of course. Should we tell the rest of the team?”

“Well…” JJ shrugs. “We could, but you know they’d bring work with them. Why don’t we go to Vegas in the morning? We can tell them then.”

Emily laughs, unable to contain her excitement. “We’re getting married! JJ, you said you’d marry me!”

“I did,” she confirms with a grin. “You’re stuck with me, Prentiss.”

“You’re stuck with  _ me _ , Jareau.”

They continued their drive, teasing each other and planning the reception. JJ suggests a balloon arch and an ice sculpture, just to see if Emily will say yes. She does, but tries to suggest subtle flowers and a chocolate fountain instead. The time passes quickly as their suggestions get more and more outlandish.

When they finally reach the north rim of the Grand Canyon, the conversation dies. The enormity of the situation hits both women, and they find themselves suddenly nervous. Neither entertain the thought of backing out for a second, but marriage is still a big deal and their excitement makes them tense. 

It’s just after midnight when they reach the entrance and the gate. A tired looking woman leans out of the booth as JJ rolls down the window. Emily starts digging through the backpack at her feet for their wallets.

“How can I help you?” the woman asks them.

JJ isn’t exactly sure how to answer. “We’re here to… get married?”

She winces at her weak answer and the fact that they picked the worst time to do this, but the woman’s eyes light up.

“You’re Penelope’s friends?”

“We are,” JJ laughs, shaking her head. “You’ve met her, then?”

The woman nods, grinning. “Yeah! She’s great! She’s waiting for you at Bright Angel Point.”

“Of course she is,” Emily mumbles, dropping their IDs back into the backpack. “Thank you, Ma’am.”

“Not a problem!” The woman giggles as she opens the gate for them. “Congratulations!”

JJ waves to her before driving into the park. It’s pitch black around them, with only the cone of their headlights providing illumination. For a moment, she wonders if they’re going to be murdered in the darkness. Their work creeps into her mind and her hands tighten around the wheel.

“Stay with me,” Emily says quietly, peeling one of JJ’s hands from the wheel and knits their fingers together. “We’re safe.”

“I know,” JJ sighs, but she tightens her hand around Emily’s. “Thank you.”

“No problem. I have to protect my wife, like a good husband.”

A startled laugh bursts out of JJ, scaring the tension away. The idea of Emily as her husband is hilarious and ridiculous. She’s never wanted a husband, but Emily would probably make a good one. She can’t fix a seat or change a tire, but she’d protect JJ, bring her coffee in the mornings, and whatever other cliche thing husbands do.

The funny thought keeps her warm for the rest of the slow drive to Bright Angel Point. As they get closer, a pool of light appears in front of them. Someone set up a couple of floodlights to illuminate the edge of the canyon, making the rocky ground glow. In the center of the light is Penelope, wearing neon leg warmers, wooly mittens, and a bright pink faux fur coat that covers a knee length skirt and leggings. Her blonde, curly hair hangs from an oversized rainbow hat.

JJ parks the car and climbs out, laughing. “Penelope Garcia!” she cheers, shutting her door. “What have you done?”

“Happy Wedding Day!” Penelope throws her arms wide, running toward them. “I love you, besties!”

She throws herself at JJ and the stronger blonde swings her around easily. They’re laughing when Emily approaches them. Penelope peels herself from JJ and hugs Emily tightly. The dark-haired woman gasps as the air is almost knocked out of her by the embrace. She grins over Penelope’s shoulder at JJ, winking as JJ burrows deep into her coat against the cold.

“Thanks, Pen,” Emily says, chuckling. “Were you able to get everything?”

Penelope backs up, grinning. “Yes! I have the rings, the paperwork, and…” She runs to one of the floodlight stands and picks a couple things up off the ground. Spinning, she reveals two bundles of white roses. “Bouquets!”

Emily laughs, leading JJ into the pool of light. “Good thinking.”

“Wow, PG,” JJ says as she takes her bouquet, “did you fly here? You got so much done in no time at all.”

“I’m amazing,” she replies, giving Emily her bouquet. “Alright, ceremony first or signing first?”

“Ceremony,” JJ and Emily answer at the same time.

They giggle nervously, grinning at each other. Somehow, wearing sweatpants and puffy coats, their hair tied up in messy buns, no make-up and only gas station food in their stomachs is the perfect way to get married. It feels like the rest of their trip - simple, easy, and comfortable. It’s like their relationship, too.

“Oh no,” JJ mumbles as her eyes watered, “I’m already crying.”

Emily smiles softly, going to her and brushing her tears away with her free hand. “It’s ok. You can cry. Are they happy tears?”

“Of course,” she laughs weakly. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

They move to kiss, but Penelope’s voice interrupts them.

“Hey! Stop that!” She walks to them and pushes them apart with an exaggerated frown. “No kissing until you’re married!”

Emily raises an eyebrow, wiggling her bouquet. “Well, marry us, then!”

“Ok, hold on!” Penelope runs to a flood light and hits a button. A small red light comes on as her camera begins recording. “For the family,” she tells them as she comes back. Moving closer to the edge of the canyon, she takes a deep breath as the other women turn to face her. “Emily,” she starts, already sounding choked up, “when I met you 10 years go-”

“God, has it been 10 years?” Emily interrupts, frowning. “Yikes.”

“Emily!” Penelope snaps, glaring at her. “Focus!”

Emily smiles sheepishly, glancing at JJ. Her smile grows when she sees JJ hiding a grin behind her bouquet. “Sorry, Peeg.”

“As I was saying,” Penelope continues, glaring at Emily. “When we met 10 years ago, I had no idea we would end up so close. You were quiet, mysterious, and incredibly sexy, but I saw the spark of a BFF in you. It’s been amazing to see you grow into the friendly, kind, and even sexier person you are today.” She wipes her face quickly and turns to JJ. “Peaches, you were the first friend I made after I joined the FBI, and I knew immediately that we were kindred spirits. You’re beautiful and wonderful and the kindest person I’ve ever met.” She pauses to take a deep breath before continuing. “It took you guys two years to start dating, which is crazy, because I knew you were in love way before that!”

“We know, Pen,” JJ says, wiping her own face. “You were right.”

“I was!” Penelope laughs. “I know you had to come together on your own, though. You had to learn to trust each other, and to take a leap of faith. Once you admitted your feelings for each other, nothing could tear you apart. You’ve almost died, and actually died, and dealt with so much tragedy and bullshit, but you’re here now! You guys have made it through all of that. I just love you guys so much! Do you have vows or something? I have to stop talking.”

JJ and Emily laugh, looking toward each other. They didn’t talk at all about vows on their drive to the Grand Canyon. Emily isn’t sure what she could say that would adequately express how she feels about JJ. The blonde felt similarly, smiling nervously.

“I… I can try?” Emily says, hands clenching around the stem of her bouquet. She waits for JJ to nod before clearing her throat. “Ok, um. JJ- Jennifer. You are my first, and only, love. You’re my first thought in the morning and my last thought at night. Just… My everything. You’re also-” A sob surprises her and she covers her mouth as tears fill her eyes. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t expect to cry!”

Penelope goes to her and puts an arm around her shoulder. “I’m here, Princess. Go on.”

“Thanks, Pen,” Emily mutters. She meets JJ’s eyes, seeing that the other woman is crying, too. “Jayje, I love you so much. It’s so easy to be with you. You’re not just big moments, but all my little moments, too. You remind me that I’m good and you make me want to be better. I met you when I was lost, and you found me. You keep finding me. I love you.” She stops awkwardly, looking at Penelope. “That’s all I have.”

“Okay,” Penelope says, giving her a thumbs up. She moves to JJ, wrapping her arms around the other woman. “I think you’ll need this, too.”

“Thank you.” JJ leans into Penelope, smiling at Emily. The brunette chuckles, wiping her eyes on her sleeves. “Emily,” JJ says happily, “I don’t even know where to start. I never expected romance to be a part of my life. I mean, I guess I thought about it in some abstract way, but you know that I never wanted to be a  _ girlfriend  _ or a  _ wife _ . It was scary, and I thought being in a relationship meant that I wasn’t strong enough on my own, but I was so wrong.” She grins, so happy to be here with Emily, and Penelope. “You’ve made me stronger than I ever thought I could be. I’m strong enough to give up control. I’m strong enough to admit when I need help. You’ve shown me that I don’t have to do everything alone. It’s not weakness to rely on someone else. You make me so happy and I don’t know who I would be without you. You show me new things, and make me see old things in a new way. I love you so much.”

She and Emily just smile at each other for a moment, basking in their declaration of love. Their whole roadtrip was a journey to this moment. The conversations about nothing in the car, the time spent exploring unimportant attractions, and the unrushed kisses, filled with nothing but love, showed them how real and stable they are. Their relationship isn’t a fluke. It’s not an 8 year long experiment. It’s  _ them,  _ together, sharing their view of the world and growing from the experience.

“Oh!” Penelope gasps, stepping away from JJ and digging into her pockets. “The rings!”

She holds them out in her mittens. They gleam in the floodlights, simple and perfect. JJ and Emily each take one, smiling at each other. Emily reaches out for JJ’s left hand.

“Here,” she says softly, “I’ll put yours on first.” She slides it onto JJ’s thin finger, admiring the way the gold shines against her skin. “Okay.”

“Your turn,” JJ sighs happily. She takes Emily’s hand and puts the ring on, brushing her thumb over the band. “God, I can’t believe we’re married.”

Emily turns to Penelope, eyes wide. “Can we kiss now?”

“Yes!” Penelope cheers, throwing her arms up. “I now declare you wife and wife! You may kiss the other bride!”

Emily pulls JJ to her, dropping her bouquet so she can wrap her arms around her  _ wife _ . JJ clings to her, her own bouquet falling from her hand. They kiss beneath the floodlights in the dark, early morning chill at the edge of the Grand Canyon with their best friend looking on. It is perfect, full of love and wonder.

They know that even if terrible things happen in the future, they’ll make it through. They’ve made it through so much and come so far. Nothing can tear them apart and nothing could ever change the way they feel. Every ending is a beginning, and their story isn’t over. They have so much more to do, and they’ll do it together. 


End file.
